#1232 - Nick Di Paolo

Jan 25, 2019

Nick DiPaolo is a writer and stand up comedian. Check out "The Nick Di Paolo Show" at http://nickdip.com and on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCghHWRYUpbsUdcsG7PrTgzQ

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it's stunning with zoom you can share anything with anyone from any device Word file spreadsheet presentation deck a YouTube video photo from your phone Etc Zoom is everything you always wanted video communication to be with so amazing features that you didn't think of but you wonder how you live without I'm you can even set up a green screen behind you to make a backdrop of your clients logo or some exotic location from around the world the only limit is your imagination now if you already use zoom you know how awesome it is but if you don't find out visit Zoom. Us and set up your free account today meet happy with zoom Video Communications set up your free account today at Zoom. U.s. my guess today is he's my friend of mine for 30 years that's crazy to say he's hilarious stand-up comedian quite a curmudgeon in his old age of a great guy I love you to death and if you get a chance to see

live please do cuz he is fucking great please give it up for Nick Apollo

The Joe Rogan Experience

bull River live next to follow here baby I can't believe that gym out there with a Porsche parked next to it. To be able to work out where you work if you do that you get more next to your porch now too bad things that working out well for you Joe and see what you doing so we were talking before I said save this cuz it's hilarious Randy credico comedian has been involved in this Rodger Stone thing yes message Rodger Stone interview on Infowars used to love my radio show on Sirius they asked me to get him on these crazy he's a loom and so is Randy and they they've they've known each other forever and are they friends while they were real

well this shit started and it's fucking classic album years ago it was him and a bunch of other guys and it was all it was all political it was like five guys are three a few guys I forget how much was on it was critical and maybe Jimmy tingle super left-wing political this is fucking way back in the day I want to say this is so they were doing this at the drive-in stock cuz he hit me up to doing such an inside political ship that was passed out on the floor

and he'll be dying up there this is why I fell in love with him and he goes he goes That's my girlfriend over there I taught her up for words in English not you crowd suck

I mean he was really fucking funny but so political and inside and instead of my apartment and he fucking like try to pick up my wife after I left I had to go on the road somewhere. But I still love him but he sent me a picture of him 2016 in front of the embassy in London where what's his name is really yes and I'm like what the fuck is going on what's he doing out there

yeah so he's got in front of Rodger Stone a couple times and and so who is Randy Credit Associates dog if he cooperated with Russia investigate what he threatened to take away his dog. Oh yeah he goes Let's Get It On Beat the prayer to die I'm going to take your braids New York to write Wix but all the right-wing people to get look at it that is so ridiculous the fucking Nick sets a good tattoo

at least any love my radio show on Sirius and and he he so so yeah they raided FBI raided his house took him out today and they got out on $250,000 Bond and he can he want a credit code to stop contesting what Woodstone said in front of when he testified so I'm still going to send it one time and I cried so I text rent I mean if you want to weigh in and he's like will call me before the show let me know because it's not too much I can say right now but I know both of you guys that is so that's so weird

what is turning Rodger Stone against Trump trump is the target so he's going to threaten guy Mueller if you if you had a problem and that guy was coming after you like oh my God cuz he's going to do it slow like by the time this actually getting all right he's going to be to do that stuff I think that's different than any way they act and I'm saying because you like chips away at his borders like slowly but surely takes away all the people around him he gets closer and you know you know you know he's concentrating on the family you know it was course that's what that's what he does any even does that with people like Stone I'll go after your family and stuff you noticed you never hear a word out of Ivanka anymore

guarantee you that scared the fuck out of here if you want to know about Molly likes it and how fucking creepy he is he was the head of the FBI during the 80s in the Whitey Bulger ship went down yeah any put for guys in Elizabeth Joe and this you can look this up this isn't me for guys he put in prison

wrongly it turns out two of them died in prison yeah you can go Google has a bulge and had to do it at them get away with it because they were providing information to write that was a whole ball exactly right and he died in prison wrongfully make those sacrifices they make those decisions where they're just cannot like help a person who is a criminal because that criminals providing information that can allow them to get more criminal shit about the guineas and You Spa

that was a great movie Till by the way when I was teaching Taekwondo Boulder

he was asked me if you want to kill somebody with your bare hands would you hit him like 18 you know he went away to it's all related all of them together you know this guy was a different guy that's who this guy was he went away too but I mean he went away forever it was one of those guys like that they caught him with blood under fingernail everybody knew it was a big or wasn't a fukin secret undies attempt to link mower to Whitey Bulger hold up Star Trek on the boxing gloves that's not true wasn't there wasn't there then wasn't the FBI most of us attorney's office in Boston from 8288 is chief of the Criminal Division first assistant us attorney and acting us attorney for more than a year

time Boulder and a sprawling criminal Enterprise got away with murders because he was a longtime FBI informant who corrupted his handlers the FBI his handlers I love it in the FBI and then a prosecutor prosecutorial unit that work independently in the US attorney's office reportedly reported directly to the justice department use Bulger to build cases against the mafia and give him a pass on his own crime the FBI is corrupt relationship with Bulger was exposed after he was indicted on federal racketeering charges in 1995 became a fugitive he was captured 16 years later I would hear

so I was captured Santa Monica China so when did Mueller says did Muir know the format of an wrongly convicted and look the other way there's nothing linking Muir to that case into several attorneys for for the man volume is court records and a former federal judge who presided over their wrongful imprisonment trial in 2017 US District Judge Nancy gertner found the FBI deliberately withheld evidence of the four men were innocent the bureau help cover up the Injustice for deck Chiefs Christ like that she ordered the government to bring the men and their families a hundred and one point seven million okay may be worth it

let's be honest you're never going to make a hundred million billion in how much time you have to do how many times you get fucked while you're in jail about is it per load

Hawkman so maybe it was just a rumor that he was a part of that well like you said that they called the paper and said listen get your facts straight nation and knew those guys were innocent that is dark who went to jail for that did the guys who covered it up go to jail I'm not sure

but you can tell they died in jail

without George was out here you know they caught him cuz his wife was yelling and shit all the time that she was Coco. A comedy and I used to go to fucking with the helmet and I would I would wonder why people look at my I take out my shit nigga but slept with the hell is like Whitey bulger's wow

see you're selling me in his neighborhood in Riviera that was connected my buddy and chat later on the Meatpacking they probably got a horse of course I'm doing my little Spiel there for a boiler math and I had you can tell they were like booked easy out the bag indoors and I N N I got the same response and I look down I see you in the streets the lines of the streets are red white and green house in Federal Hill Providence Whitey Bulger Santa Monica Hideout was full of money it's still brims with Mr he was living in like a normal apartment so weird

wow Jesus Christ I like that movie I thought you wanted that was great and it was great to get it's just amazing how much corruption was involved yes what does federal government was a part of it and they let that monster they'll nthrive capable whenever you doing that whenever you're allowing someone to commit murder and deal drugs to get other people that are committing murder and dealing drugs like what happens with cops in this very unfortunate but this is just what happens when you have a a game and the game is arrest people the game is when right and if you can make more colors because you're in bed with a bad guy especially if maybe you grow up in that neighborhood has always been kind of an accepted part of that neighborhood that Nikon light grew up with what

make a little deal as it's all about you and me that's one of the reasons why cops and people I'm such a weird relationship cuz they're always looking to arrest people and I got to get somebody but they have like when you have quotes the police force do if nobody broke Rhymes anymore to make shut up if they would have been gone but what if everybody got on mushrooms and end of the world the world the world got cleaned up not much how much time can we have a conversation with mushrooms

you do that shit we had the best question to Bellow nice glaze a demi glaze on it it just it's very interesting is very interesting because you're watching a professional like cast of web like nice and slow nice and slow and it will do it again to Rajasthan assessment I guess I mean Trump's the final Target so but yeah he's going to he's going to threaten threaten someone 10 years he's probably going to make them sing but he's such a flake.

they actually had a dershowitz put it there actually I'll come up with the lyrics they create but I'm just saying what do you think is going to happen to Trump if you had to guess

as far as this investigation Mountain song because I think Mom was pretty fucking evil and then we'll come up with something well you know what impeachment High crimes and misdemeanors what wealth is obstruction of justice if there was collusion if there was any sort of if they can prove that there was some sort of concerted effort to undermine democracy by that I don't think I don't think they'll get to that get them Rodger Stone they're not charging him with collusion and conspiracy just lying and covering up they don't they don't have them for collusion of conspiracy lying and covering up the interactions with Russians right so it is

cast and it is fucking fascinating how much Russian troll farms and all these fake accounts and what they're trying to do and what one of the things are trying to do is what Jamie was saying was that that kid with the Maga hat was a Native American beat the drill out of that was posted by this website was it as a blogger in Brazil but can't because the account was a fake account yet they had thought it was supposing as a California teacher is Thalia but it was in Brazil I was Brazil wasn't rushing I wasn't sure

but you're doing that people need to understand this and doing more and more each other's throats and enough to really get people turned against each other you need angry discourse and the way that comes from there's there's an amazing Radiolab podcast about this and these troll farms and that these people were they they would both be left-wing and right-wing as what about on the Sam Harris podcast it's I think it's called The War of information but they'll pose as a pro-choice people and say ridiculous yes like over the top or opposes provide people with American flag in Omega in the

#move in there they're heading but they are and they're just trying to get people riled up and see people jump on board but I was the comic that we were talking about that. I won't bring his name up but he referred me to this this Russian guy

I cannot remember his name but this is a clip of this Russian guy who worked for the KGB Defector over here and his explain how Russia does that mrs. back in the 80s it to everybody they all do it everybody doesn't they fuck with the system in any way shape or form in order to achieve a desired result think the Russians are the best more dedicated to it mean it's a sneaky way to go about doing doesn't have the kind of money that the United States has the size of Texas all they have is nuclear weapons and a brutal dictator it's a small European country but it's really interesting when you you listen to these podcast about how much effort they put into sewing discourse or Discord to getting people upset with each other

starting arguments and to saying things that are going to upset people in order to get the right versus the left to undermine democracy from the inside

it's it's weird that works but it makes sense that works sneaky a strategy

you think CNN does just as good a job you really do but you're so right when you cannot sell center-right of Sun by the airport before I'm doing a gig the last fucking words I want to hear a Wolf Blitzer for my plane crashes on Jeopardy and expose them they seemed really

Footloose celebrities I once dropped he's very smart one of our time or is he still write for is Wolf Blitzer - $4,000 a dumbass

that didn't work out so well it's fucking funny that is hilarious I hope you know people can pretend to be smart script you know but it was Jonathan Groff is he still write for Conan don't, but he was really really bright and how to get up stand up anymore though they just rides can I tell somebody is this nonsense is joking joking on side enough is enough

but why do you hate CNN

come on all the fucking shit they put out there and just an example how about before the when Donna brazile have the notes for Hillary before the fucking Bernie yes member that would discredit and I still had her on that's what I'm doing to us if they had to run after that I told it was a question what's interesting they fucked her over and then she came back Bernie out of the primary

Bernie get screwed with the dark business there all the mainstream media

propaganda arm for the Democratic party episode maggots average they definitely think they're working for the good but I know he's an unusually polarizing figure when was it that way with an idiot no racist you can look at the ship year after year it's the same shit racist bigot race and it works and 4 and 1/2 late but the mainstream media has always

watch Fox News which everybody hates watches never watch is it number one the kid do you think that's why I say I do that's the only to head down like a pound for chrissake let's change the subject he's getting irritated with me already I got to get you out of La I'm afraid you're going to get disease but what we just talking about why they hate Trump because alpha male blonde hair blue-eyed fucking billionaire that is the that's the embodiment of the devil for the left they never bring that up on the Shelf

as opposed to Obama go now you can keep your Healthcare I mean the fucking and I know if he is a fine line but it's definitely a Salesman but that's what I always heard a little bit I mean it's some sort of an organization to realize Hillary Clinton wild are you there is the question you know yeah it's a great question I was talking to Mike Baker who used to work for the CIA Mike Baker from the CIA if he did anything remotely like what Hillary did he'd be in jail for 30 years of course

I mean he like took a selfie and it had batch in the background of how long was he in jail I don't know Equity as far as people being held accountable on both sides that's well maybe would have been different if Hillary made it through maybe you would have been different in terms of like media coverage if she actually became president that would have sucked their ass

I think so I don't know man once Donna brazile's book came out and people have an understanding about the inner workings of the party look politics or it's dirty dirty business fail day starts worse than podcast but why was trying to explain to a friend who was talking about doing a podcast deal with a network sounds like stop saying that you can have will you get it could be mainstream it's free of everything free of any influence and you're going to let a bunch of pen pencil pushers and unbutton pressers they're going to tell you what you can and can't say which direction you can and can't go you know they're going to try to influence you but isn't Google doing that

now what do you mean with conservatives like shutting down Dennis Prager has like a fucking what do you mean

long time ago song by go about a company or I'm talking about a company you go into business with the world where you can be completely free and independent still reach millions of people it really is the only thing in the world are religious right guy is it she'll get shut down on YouTube and shut down shut down with what happened to him cuz I'm completely ignorant about this is the first time I know this is going to go to the Supreme Court

yeah they say shut the show down you remember what it was about not specifically but I know it was labeled hate and if you listen to this guy for 10 minutes she's the most congenial fair-minded you know but he's he's a religious guy

he's actually he's a he's an intellectual from England who wrote about a book about immigrants in Europe called the strength I think it's called Islam in the strange death of Europe and he's basically talking about how people from these countries that have immigrated into Europe are changing the culture in which is all sorts of you know crimes and things are happening that didn't exist before and people developing these communities of like-minded people that didn't exist no go zones and he saying that this is you know this is fundamentally dangerous but he's saying it from a point of perspective of understanding the actual facts involved and talking about the situation talking about how he's a people that don't respect homosexuals they want to throw them off cruise and they have these right

align with European values in modern Western World right he and Sam Harris had a conversation and that conversation got flag on YouTube it got flag someone put it up in there no you make it look a little watchlist what is it called when it was a call of the list you can will you put it on YouTube on your channel what are you could the playlist so he puts it on his playlist Andy gets a computer a community guidelines strike against them for putting up his conversation between two intellectual conversation with this lady at YouTube why why would you do that why why does a cat chews bolts hate speech is hate speech have you talked about to intellectual having a discussion about a real thing that's happening right now in Europe you're saying hate speech if you listen to the podcast there's no slur used just facts are just talking about with this is the way she said it cuz it takes Peach like you have you said that so easily yes you've never seen that's a lot of power but it's also a lot

irresponsible power but but but but my point is that cracking down on people who lean right whether it's Twitter that's a big fucking problem hate speech what's the name of the company that owns alphabet they going to decide what what I brought that up on top crowd years ago about about when you disagree with a liberal or whatever you're arguing with your hater they would keep saying that and that's what it turned into if you disagree rate you're a hater now it's you're a bigot or racist if you didn't agree with Obama's policies you a bigot or racist and and that's that's been working for the left the years but now that the social media Google controls almost all the information you want you and I hear everyday I mean that's why it's so dangerous so it look up

is the first example that comes to mind

yeah because he's he's a Christian to whatever we from YouTube at least they weren't deleted they were restricted put it like me in your life or something like that and they were fighting and having a lawsuit against that's what they have in their videos or not shouldn't be behind that like that wall whatever that is they also then but this is my point you have to go to YouTube to get the store right or was I went to a couple of the website to see it but they were also like yesterday they had ads blacklisted from Spotify so they had to ask that were I guess it was initially approved and now they have been disappearances haven't really explained to them but his page is still up

but the YouTube page is still up so you go to the Dennis Prager YouTube channel doesn't exist

so what would make that 18 + because it's conservative that's hilarious it's up it's got a million subscribers million 914 Shattuck showtimes Santa brought it back up Spotify and Prager from advertising I mean he's he's so Mmm Yeah no I believe you so my point being is these big toe big tech companies a crush and conservative yes and here's a good way to look at it if you're going after a guy with Dennis Prager who is most congenial guy never swears very very mild-mannered very cool and calm

common would you agree with him or disagree with him it's not the way to go about something like this if you disagree with someone is not to shut them down I'll just have a dip a exactly and that's not happening well you know what you saw the Google memo you saw what happened with that guy when he provided all this information about one of the reasons why women don't get into Tech and they labeled him as writing a massage right if you scientific study that have different interests and that's all he said he was he brought up the numbers of males going to the science and math he didn't say women not good at it and he get fucking can from here you can't have it if it disagrees with the Orthodoxy come down and you and you could clearly back it up

the actual numbers to put a page-and-a-half in there on strategies for encouraging women to get an attack if he was a real massage work right that was what started all these intellectuals came to his side all this research if you guys completely ignore every time it comes out pretending it's it's scientific information that shows that certain types of people are more interested in different things we've known that forever that's why boy toys and girl toys are different cuz boys and girls like different shit means basically more complex version of that he's essentially saying women like different things it doesn't mean that they can't talk about this the only difference between the Sexes is socially constructed obstacles will gender is you know the gender self it is they should come here and take a look at your place

shut up shut the argument adult male male gender place you have a warehouse of mail but this looks that's not a nice guy that's not bad intercourse with the problem is in this Society Hill energy is vilified and you're taught to think of something wrong with being masculine the reason why we don't speak German okay stop mask you could be the poster boy for that the whole reason why you need male people is because there's mail people other places that will take away your shit until your people straight white male does not equal evil just because there are evil men they are evil because we don't men are evil

I bet you did more than 3 what is you're so many dumb phrases like that you know heteronormative

I'm sure you know cisgendered cisgender yes heteronormative worms like as if heterosexuality is normal well did you see what was the story couple days ago and I was in California hear a beautiful state of California I've been tryna the heat you can't say he is she as they now I'm saying she's been sitting in the passenger at the end she goes my my grandma my grandma teacher wouldn't approve of that she's rolling around all we won't hear from her she said her and somebody called her out on it as she was

I was just going to give you some the left-wing nonsense since California state Senator bands use of he and she during committee hearings oh look at her with her perfect fucking little girl haircut just hilarious and that is so funny

oh my God we won't be hearing from her will you make me listen to corrected her usage and stop stop

the corrected her usage and gold demand that she use the word they or them they demanded to this is the problem with all this shit it's demanding the trying to control people to telling people what to do what not to do and it's about power a lot of this stuff is about power but it's not even their worldview it's not real what it is is there just deciding that this is a thing that they're going agree to they going to force other people to comply it's half the game I have to game is just getting people to comply and you start with language you can shut people's behavior which is the definition of well that's what Carlin we said that fascism is just political correctness with good manners that are part of the correctness is fascism with good manners how about when he was talking about this house you know Millennials whoever demanding what we call them yesterday or them

calicos I got to come up with something more clever not as hard

yeah what did you think about all that stuff getting leaked

how about Bubba Lewis about that if you took that movie and filmed in the movie theater and then put it online you would be you go to jail that's right you're expelled in your you're ruining his work yes but they think they can ruin his work cuz he jerked off in front of some people I don't even know if it's that leak it like was a Lewis Hader sometimes it just table and I'm up there doing my shit and working on a new hour and the kid about 56 raw I see him I see the red light phone app scan

material do you get it it's all the other fans at listen to it for sure and also it's not fair because these bits are never done like if you want to release it half-baked like when you first start working on a bit you have a promise you got kind of an idea where it's gone and then it eventually becomes a bit they would put on a special look shity in and then and it's off it's done you doing a bit that's complete it becomes old without some of the things that people are saying about the old stuff you saw when it was done like if you came to the store and saw him working on a set like a few years back you would see the same kind of stuff I got a couple, I put my last special out there like you came out to see me 8:10 months ago when I was working on it yeah it's it's it's something process cuz it seems like when you're onstage into town at the top

and it seems like you're doing something that they can do just talkin talkin I can talk to him like that it's just talkin that's exactly right nobody yells at a concert nobody fucking know I can play baseball team that your coffee made but it's standout probably do people have you know because people have made their friends laugh I think Seinfeld sign-in book years ago because you know you make your friends laugh everybody's made their friends, can I call people out when they look in your face I know you could do this to but you'd rather work at the fucking Mattress Factory 80 hours a week making fucking $400 cuz people at their work in the Mattress Factory right now listening this going man fuck you fuck them hey how are you just ignore the guy that says

what's good night in San Diego like I have to pay you a lot of money to build me a mattress

but you said if I have to pay for the phone

stop my wife's boobs when you get this done metal to company of veterans I got a flag they sent me when I did the Afghanistan yourself that guy sent me a flag that they used in battle

nice you have a fold it up and I had it hanging but then I made a gym out of my fucking whatever so I don't know where it is and should probably put it back up should not worry about it. Louis CK set you know it was very similar in my opinion to all the shit that he did before he got in trouble very very similar that's the way I mean people forget that this is a guy who won on Saturday Night Live and did a joke about pedophile in about maybe we should like your kids I mean was fucked up it's a fucked-up bit but he was the darling of the lamp back then and so has allowed to get away with that if he tried to do that say metier if he hadn't done that then and instead did that now people would be fucking horrified what is it you about offending women

today's feminist what it did they are thick in my opinion always put up a practice that we hate so much shut. They are at the Corbin Davis TV Zeitgeist of the time just like a fat chicks emotion very sensitive you can't you can't cross them because people are realizing now that they can make an impact things that are red cuz he's doing his thing in Pittsburgh he was doing the Improv in Pittsburgh and this lady who wrote the article wrote that he's making people put their cell phones and bags much like comedians Joe Rogan do she is my name to but the only reason why I was doing it had nothing to do with Steve and she said because they know words can defend and they don't want the contest prizes I'm going to put it on Netflix

I'll be out to the public itself if you're looking to get offended is plenty in there for you but I need to be able to do it correctly like I'm I want to work it out so that it has the maximum amount of laughs with the minimum amount of a people getting it the wrong way right so this at all about worrying and sitting upright listening to it maybe there's a better way and you can't do that if somebody releases your shit's all these people that don't know, Dee and they're saying that's like you have no idea what the processes like you just don't and if you if you do you would respect and appreciate the people that are Comics that don't respect and appreciate the process like that's where we are now it's just because people can make an impact they can have a reaction just like the people yelling at her you know that did she said she said oh my grandma to be rolling over in her grave to get a reaction from you there just trying to push buttons do just knowing

that they can say something and they can have some sort of an impact we're going to get Louis CK banned from here you know we're going to get Nick DiPaolo kicked out of this club you can't come to this club you talk negatively about women in women's empowerment and it's dangerous to girls get kicked out of place cause some of the best clubs in the country club Denver Comedy Works music for what was the bachelorette party ruining the middle guys set that the MC set and that I went up my second time there I think that's a great club, and they started yelling shut the club so I was kicked out of it

that's how I feel drop well I was throwing up because of my words well and I get kicked out for smoking on stage RoosterTeeth those the only two places that was a long time ago the right smoking on stage

what you say still I just really started I was 15-20 years ago I was a social smoker Mattel breathing in his shit and so I'd have wanted to but then I really pick up the pace about a year ago I fuck is that what it's not like I don't know I just know I like it but but the lights well I'll take cancel that you don't like tumor how many smoking today

half a pack really do too smart for that that's outrageous. Jail please you are can't kill me but can't while my grandfather smoked Pall Malls and felt in camels

it's do I do cuz my friends why would my doctor tells me I have cancer in 25 years

you see the looks on guys in their eighties they look happy they like I wish I smoked when I was a fucking kids

I know you would have disapproved

biographical sketch a very vain I don't want anything to do with the boys never promised that's how I you say I don't need it that's why I don't need it because I do it if I didn't do it I would like a regular old man

trust me if I get John it go to a doctor to get your hormone levels checked and I'll quit the cigarettes to make some pains in the

but I'm 5 5 9 and 3/4 to 13

that's not too bad but it's not like I haven't seen you I've been working out a lot plus shot into my knee. I can't let him sit I've got stem cell before and it felt good and then I run in a miles in the Hills every day a week later I can

yes I have I have slight arthritis in both knees down stem cells help help that definitely does there's there's a bunch of different things you could do to help that before it gets real bad but I want things to do in Panama and I sent my mom down there to a doctor Neil Riordan cuz and Mel Gibson's dad was 92 when he went down there was in a wheelchair is all fucked up eight years and he walks a hundred years old

Sedona masks not sit happens when you wash it out and you can you can say races should you get it off your chest you look to you on well it's only the booze that makes racist Now show us fucking guys my hero

fucking love Mel Gibson he's ever made a bad movie I mean made it himself a few ship ship movies but the toxic masculinity I thought that was great I think he's a very intense very unusual eccentric guy I just being around him you you get the sense of his energy like Raven and probably came like that character probably came from like the Dark Inner workings of Mel Gibson's mind really is like that I don't have that energy and Jeb Bush low energy

I'm laying on the couch and I hear about somebody dying an avalanche and I watched it on TV and I laughed cuz I would never fucking be dropped off in a helicopter at the top of the mountain to go snowboarding yeah and then they die and laughing my balls off in a bag of chips what the one person is never called anybody anything is Nancy Pelosi and people like why hasn't come up with a nickname for her yet

yeah you know you can't say contact that's going to cost him the election that'll cost me 22 until Trump calls Hillary a car what kind of a nickname if you were going to help him like if he hired you like Nick loc solid Republican, to help me with my one-liners what do you think I call her on my shelf life for her the the leathery nippled going to do some pretty good luck to meet you in like a lion Ted call Hillary crooked Hillary

yeast infection heals

how about lying liberal

smok stick do you know that she's worth a hundred million dollars yes I do but she represents the Mansion meanwhile people laying their own feces in San Francisco will that Laura Loomer check the chick that a handcuff yourself to Twitter she hop Nancy's fence and he started setting up like a camp did you see that what happened what was the result it illegal she's doing something illegal she's trespassing I would say the Nancy I'll be outside tomorrow bright Build That Wall or don't I don't think we have the machine guns and tanks

you don't have to kill I'm serious about that you're going to laugh okay

you don't have to but seriously I love how we rule out lethal Force as far as protecting outboard that's not even on the plate so it's to Medieval to pick somebody off as they're climbing up but you something Leslie fallis Super Soaker filled with catfish

what's up a woman and her baby come come over here if you want to send it back to where the fuck that came from

give no one a sympathy for those folks who try to come over here where it where immigrant children absolute write me when did your parents come over my grandpa as well as the turn of the century link 1902 92.3 yep Monday should have stayed in Italy you think people should have stayed and Paul in the iris is this experiment is not working as fuck is wrong with you watch this viral video

it's not I know you're joking around but I kind of see my seemed a little bit more. Our previous conversation

the party member the better okay now you have people loved it but he knows all the time I watch the news and you see a lot of people dying you know fighting for us let a Latino names and I'm a big fan that's not the problem you know so

but I don't think he should be labeled a bigot if you believe in securing the borders and it's not immoral about all the heroin coming over for trial the Bring It On listening cargo ships most of it's coming over and talking to a guy was a longshoreman about that cuz I don't know what the fuck seen those things I know and that creepy when I'm going to blow up a already have these ideas call me up and said that's not a bad idea how did you get punched who why did that lady puncher it was a twenty-year-old by Paula girl I was at Levity Live

I did a shell came offstage went into the green room for a few minutes and then came back out and I will standing to the left of the stage after the show I just don't feel it's in the job description sometimes I'll do it sometimes I want but some people started coming up and shaking hands taking pictures and this guy approaches me so look like you a little bit stands to my right and he goes can I get a picture that goes to stand on my right I'm looking at him talking to him is I enjoy the show but my daughter wanted to punch you in the face he didn't even finish the word face and I get suckered from this side you choose in the fucking room all set

well and I need bam I mean fucking you know I was and if you have a good fucking sucking I could feel the eye closed and immediately you know and I looked right at him this is how things were when I was in shock I go did you just fucking set me up know it's nothing like that he didn't jump in and he didn't jump in and was it that he was complicit in it but she still pursuing it what did she do she thought I was racist and sexist mean while there was a table of black people Dominican was a very diverse crowd absolutely loved it coming to my defense after that happened nobody got a friend that even a friend of mine and see me my time at night

that's cheap Birkenstocks on and I'm still pursuing it and they apologized and said I shouldn't have brought here when I get the comedy and he behaved he didn't have the balls to do it himself cuz I Look At You by can get you to burn off some energy Jesus Christ veteran-owned coffee it's very great stuff but yeah I saw that you had the funniest this is what's funny about it for years people tell me

but they're all gone why did you hit her back when you texted me like the next day or that night I can't remember and you said

5 minutes U-Boat jogos I thought you was going to be a good thing to hear what you made me laugh so hard because she's a real thing and if you like what you would have taken the lights clear up like a helicopter blade I was belly laugh and provide you a little like weapon this leg kicker I thought I saw you in a very hurt your eyes can see it I have a permanent someone can hit you in the oven when do you adjust good for you you can lose your vision mean that's 100% possible happened to be bald I had a slight concussion she really fucking I'm not shocked especially if you didn't know about you

I don't know I hope I wouldn't have done what I think I would not be so you could lose a lot of time to get insurance for that a real problem is when you're not thinking when you get hit and then you immediately respond that's a real problem cuz you seen that video that giant 6 ft 5 guy who punched at 11 year old girl in the face she had it, and she pushed him first but he definitely should not punch him in the face is big giant fucking guy with a nice shot you don't want you don't want to punch a girl you don't wanna hit it and I didn't want to go into that reptilian part of your brain either that just responds to being assaulted. That was killed

I saw you remember that clip years ago you in the parking lot at the comedy still arguing some broad I thought you were going to be for a long time until she's coming time when she's going to she's going to get hit me with a cigarette in like listen you're not doing anything

next which is so stupid that people think they can get away with things like that while they can you be if you were alone in a parking lot with their girl and she punched in the face like that I said this and I've been making this point you want true gender equality if we had it I could have fucking knocked her the fuk up you showed amazing restraint knot in your back cuz I wasn't drinking and what wrestler at least copter and I would have gave her from behind on 31 I would have came from here and this black cat walks up behind like a wife beater and whines up from his ass off with an open hand

it will blow your brains out if you have to have I was proud of myself and that's why I was laughing after the incident people I know who been telling me you know you know they were all like the adult in the room and I know I know the time to 11 again where it wouldn't matter the circumstances toxic masculinity if if I croak there well I don't know man if someone punches you and you punch a bag I don't know what the fucking rules are about I don't think she's very small but you should be fucking hitting people now what you said you were working on it still in the middle of it like what's going on with it

stop pursuing it and they eat it's just so you can tell they don't give a fuc the VA was a woman in that county and now she's off the case for some reason they Shuffle the what they want it should be a assault aggravated something of course you can't go cuz if you don't get that I can't sue her Sibley if I lost that would hurt my case if at least that's the logic they were telling me to be trying to get her with like second-degree harassment and now that there's a new woman on the case and she said they've been making her go to you know anger management and cuz she has mental issues and I'm not looking for money I just want to make an example of her so but worn out know nobody. Nobody wanted to take the case because I'm fine

really yeah they like a site's not fucked up you're not in a wheelchair guy Andrew Funk was a lawyer who was a Marine

and I said that he he contacted me and he put me in touch first with a Russian woman who who took about three of my calls and she get tired because it was no money involved and then he hooked me up with another guy another lawyer who right now I'm dealing with but

yeah they will all right up front it if is no money involved in your not permanently you're not going to let you know but I just I don't want money and this guy sort of agreement to Sandra fat guys Marine he just wants to make an example she said I was racist and sexist so I just want to make him looking for money but it really pisses me off she goes to school in Upstate New York so she's not that not she lives on a round but it's the fucking old man

that was complicit in it I think he actually used hers is like a weapon that night it seems like you'll be way harder to prove that she was that he was complicit that would be never she she she ran up to the lobby which is normally where you take pictures with fans and she she would she put her head on a table was crying and she realize what you've done or whatever you know they took her like a psychiatric hospital so they saying well you know I just want to make an example of her that's all that's ridiculous

and the next time I will head back you think I don't know I'll give me a kick a field goal from the lead of the pussy could be how you damage

I just would say don't either but damn you get even in the opportunity somebody actually hit you you didn't hit him one of my proudest moments should be proud of that I don't ever get into it with a fan of drinking me how do you restrain yourself essentially invited him to get killed

how'd you do that come on up here come on pal say what's up and some asshole everybody before the show before I got to stay when everybody is a long time ago probably 2003-2004 and I didn't even want to get famous there was no social media back then not speak of people interrupting comedy and the colonies were back then had zero protection police another Cloud crowd crowd control at all but the people that are drinking and weird stuff can happen so unfortunate

yeah it's just you know people that don't have respect for Performance Tool then I respect for what you do and it's difficult and if they disagree with you they think they're disagreeing even if it's just a joke you didn't even know where the joke is going Phil interrupt I know y'all stuff out and they just know no regard for the Forum that you're in the factors hundreds of other people that are there to see you it's about their mind and they're selfish notion that they want to get out right away today and they have no idea how little it takes the throw up the balance of the room just a slight confrontation set up an owl sound like you're the bad guy and a lot of times it's somebody right up front so they can't hear us calling somebody for no reason you have had that too and I'm super sensitive

somebody farts in the 52nd row I can hear it for whatever I am I just have that you know you know exactly coming cuz you do you study what's going on you read their faces and what not and I'm really good at it and fucking if I see one person laughing out of 600 I'm not left yet, but I fixed it I've had two states that wall after about 12 clubs that listen to go to stop I am so much better and not hitting her know I got a couple years ago what was it about amongst each other serious talk about hitting a girl I just stood on the stage

girls and there's a girl in the Middle with their fists up like you took free bucket and hits one of the iWatch is about to come across the room and drop her like a fucking use rubber I mean hit her like I got to choose a guy

famous woman is taking them now they jump in every time you see if fighting football game is stanzas women think I'm sorry but legislation you can't fucking legislate the antibiotic and they're always in the middle that you noticed that a lot of rain washed while there's a lot of people in general to think that go around punching people look how about it all these and Tifa dorks that are starting to fight the swing at people did you see the one guy a guy swings at this guy with a bat or with a baton the guy catches the Baton and his head snaps back in his head bounces off the concrete when he falls down it's awful to watch like what the fuck made you think you could just hit a man with a stick cuz you guys disagree with each other

interview map, look look antifa is just like any other group of people they give you a community whether it's a gang or whether it's a criminal organization or what people fall in line with the sensibilities of that organization and then you do what you can to support the door and then you know you start wearing ski masks and hitting people with sticks and everybody's practicing karate in the park cuz I think they're going to be able to defend themselves the whole thing's ridiculous but because their life has no value outside of that look my parents were hippies and when I grew up I always thought that people on the left were peace-loving that was that was what the the the the knock was educated but you're seeing now

people in the left like these certain factions of them not all of them but people are calling for violence do violent pacifists ironically yeah right they're calling for Allegheny Pirates have you ever seen a more punchable face extreme lack of empathy for young people to like young people that that don't fall in line with their ideas they don't give a fuc the punch him thrown in jail lock them up just like the lack of empathy in a lack of thought behind it it's very unsocial made it is only throwing gas on that yes and then you got these Russian accounts that are firing this up on both sides that are attacking from the left and the right I think that's a way bigger issue than people think I think these these troll farms and these people that are setting up these fake accounts and just getting people riled up

things out there and a lot of people just right yet they fall into these arguments like how many people do you know the get involved in Twitter argument and then they take their dates to what those arguments all day to keep checking their mentions to get it oh yeah I believe involved that if someone can get you involved in that like if the Russians can get a group of dummies involved in that kind of thing could literally change the way people are interacting with you with each other to making the interactions more aggressive more violent so you think it's the Russians I think it has something to do with it I think there's a polarization between the left and the right. But I think they are definitely drunk as I was reading or that listen to rather the Sam Harris podcast very fucking interested because they're they're talking about what we actually know about the date and where it's coming from and who are these people doing this and how they said anything's up

yeah that guy the, do you want to talk about

again that clip of this fraction who's a former KGB guy who defected to this country explaining how it works

one bag of explaining exactly how it works when he was saying this is 30 something years ago 35 is going down exactly what this idea that trumps working with him is fucking silly well I don't know about that I don't think he's working with him to undermine democracy but I definitely think they've got some business dealings mean they were offering him to try that's not illegal to Penthouse in Trump Axolotl legal none of that is illegal don't take that for me take that both of us but I don't think that he was honest about that he said I don't do any dealings with Russia I don't have any business with Russia he definitely did that is not true

you think he's going to just thought maybe impeachment but I'll even on on what K I don't even know what they get them high crimes and misdemeanors I don't I don't know what what he's done to talk about building a tower in Moscow is not illegal to have business and what do you what did he lie about specifically what was a lot like what we can pull it up let's let's find a salon., so I know which one to tell us that goes like I'm not a trump scholar I haven't and I have at my disposal all the different times and he lied but it's a lot so what do you think's going to happen till you think I don't know but I'm not. I'm not claiming to be any sort of an expert in legal proceedings I have no idea. That's why I called it dershowitz I think

Michael Giuliani and saw this text but hold on a second what's the NBA preseason myths truths it's a European paper but a little on 15 a day cuz I don't know I don't know clean and accuracies you doubt that it's true you think it's all lie that just made up the fact that he lies a lot

about lies about what if I first met with the definition of ally it says Washington Post who they hate such claims in 2018 by the last day of 2018 mean they can't lie the total figure visiting to 7600 so you think they just made up all these lies not all of them but you could you could go back with Hillary and fucking, you can go to go to Fox News and then put all that pull up an art gallery whataboutism when someone talks about something and instead of refuting it with facts about Hillary committed with what you were saying that Hillary

I think he's a liar I think she deleted 30,000 e-mails rights criminal I think there are the Clinton Foundation a fucking fully illegal organisation I think they rig the DNC I think they they they rigged the primaries against right I'm not a supporter of somebody made a statement like that Bill Clinton was in office so I don't think Hillary should ever accuracy but first of all when Bill Clinton was in office they were I don't know but that's a whataboutism me I'm saying we're just talking about Trump you were saying that Trump doesn't lie and they're saying you lies of a lie if he miss State something

did he doesn't write I'm sure sometimes when you're talking that much is 1900 times a day do you think you watch it on my watch later how about the Deep State how about this how about the fucking dossier what why is it that mean the dossier for fisa application I just I don't know what do you mean the dossier the fact that they had you have with all that so you being willfully ignorant though I don't know I don't know

this is as big a story is everything Trump has done what is Bastille Day

used they went he had the application the fisa courts and they went they use the DNC opposites Christmas steel who's a British guy had connections in Russia remember when I said Trump was that hotel and watching girls peeing on each other that was all in the Steele dossier Christmas Tale it's okay they use that and their application to get a fisa warrant to spy on Trump during his campaign that's fact that's not me being a right winger that is fact okay so but the fact that like that you don't know that now I remember that now but you bet you're just as Trump get a lying about the number paper does inauguration I want to know that I want to know a live from Trump that's equal equal in power is like when Obama said it on health care that you could keep your Healthcare in all that give me an example of trump with that big of a lie

well listen I told you I'm not give me a quick look we just showed you all the numbers of the Washington Post Provider from Publix so if I give you another example you going to say that one more done than any other Administration okay this is Ally so true blah blah blah sing that's a lie will let's see let's see let's see what it says this isn't what is it is it mean to send it

what cups of coffee are being shown to the mainstream media hates why would you put your fucking because I want to know is whether or not they are saying what it what is stop stop doing a go back to where was later said that he intended the UN moment to Garner a laugh that is repeated his claim seriously since okay so he says that my alternative the administration is accomplished more than almost any Administration in history the country so this is just not finished and people are laughing when you said that he was saying that he meant to say it as a laugh there are measures of success but it's not true this Administration has been more successful than any other Administration in history when it comes to legislation Trump aside plenty of bills and first to use a President Barack Obama in his first two years has significantly more sign significantly more

one thing I mean I'm sure there's many many other things that you can keep the only over and over again I'm with you and that's it right but I'm just saying because you lie so much is a butter fucking server and about the Steele dossier that that is huge that is getting under covered like nobody's been

when they at Mass General Flynn

that that that dwarfs Watergate that's interesting conversation I don't know if that's the truth I don't know enough about Watergate I'll be going on here but yeah I'm not you're not against me but I'm just saying to call Trump a bigger liar than the fucking every other politician is an exaggeration I don't know why the mainstream the liars I think that just a little bit of custom to doing that but I think the way he lies is unusual

I think it's the way to go. Years would never get credit for it and I don't unless you watch Fox News you're not going but would you agree that as you get older you become more like more conservative than I was always a bit of a dick

I got a tattoo of next time I ask I thought it was for old and liberal girl you have no mind yeah and I like that

that's true but I could always detect the bullshit and I mean I mean I remember watching CNN in an airplane when I first started, and it's like 1988 night you know and getting excited some of the shit it's interesting because I don't disagree with you on everything and I love you as a person you're a great guy I like you alot always happy to see you but yet you and I hear get a little heated talked about this. But this is politics is how divisive politics or if it even a person like me I would never leave here we go on trailer for 30 years that's not the problem what I'm saying is I'm just using his example and how divisive politics people talk about yeah I am not afraid of a lot of people are afraid of bad vibes and bad feelings then this is what they need but this is one of the things that makes people tow the line just the fear of this kind of all the key

the fear of this kind of like you don't want that from inside your party so you will write you start using they and them you start thinking that everyone should be able to use any bathroom that they feel like they identify with you start you start going along the line it's one of the more interesting things about politics is that if you tell me that you are Republic and I can kind of guess your stance on God I can kind of guess your stance on pro-life pro-choice second amendment rights like all those things for the fall in line and it's very interesting very interesting how you you sort of adopt not you but people sort of adopt a whole group of things when you decide you're a Republican or a Democrat but how do you feel about guns

Johnny M I'm not a big gun guy as far as abortion

I wants a pro-choice but I'm not I'm not pro-life

one of the big reasons is if you'd like I got a dad is dying of Alzheimer's watching them to the saddest thing if I could kill him tomorrow and put him out of his misery I would I think you could take him to Oregon

states that allow that are states that allow people to

I think that I go over state lines for all of us know there was a girl who is dying of cancer who went to Oregon for that very reason yeah there were organisms one of those I want to I might be saying it wrong but I think the ideas of a right to a dignified death Staying Alive until your heart stops beating really a horrible pain and it's it's it's evil I had to put my dog down okay I love this dog of Adam Adam for 13 years I had to put him down because you didn't walk anybody to Chuck a problem to a place you know you actually came to my house actually and they'd put him down

sad shit but but you can't do that for a 98 year old man is falling apart you have to let him eventually stop breathing right you know it's the weather that should be your first right that's why I was the guy in the alley with a stick

I can understand why I don't play in Showbiz Joe right onto of 10 issue. You're like a fucking Nazi and I made called alt-right adjacent to my favorite oh my God to keep coming up with me all right because I'm pretty left wing on most things out so they call me all right adjacent to the have people you want now I'm going to be more alright adjacent cuz you cuz you in that silly you have me on to be like listen to this guy I don't think that should be a feather in your cap and they going to hold it against you well it's not rational but again it's people trying to have an effect on you or trying to have an affect the trying to make some waves trying to do something the writing blogs or creating videos but they're doing it to try to put pressure on you

it's interesting though we it's weird from a psychological perspective you looking at it from the outside you know it's a disconcerting when it's happening to you but when you step back and look at it like it's interesting it's like these systems are opposing each other and they're trying to figure out where the weaknesses are and how to how to push to affect the other side and it's not just you know it's bigger than that so I can out the bucket right.

What's the place where they go to meet every year Bohemian Grove

grutas de Burgh group that was one of my favorite books the truth about the Bilderberg Group and what goes on there in the powerful people that meets

the boss has probably 10 guys in a room that friend the whole fucking well okay but you show me them

until then I'll stay in the Left Right fight Netflix right the ideas or there's 10 guys that control everything and they don't give a fuck if it's left or right there just about money and a big but it's weird that that was relatively a planchette out decades ahead yeah that last 15 year it would plot points and it was that book with a credible account but yeah but I don't I don't I don't mind the Comedy Cellar that's how tough crowd came about me a pick 3 shelling at each other about Rachel's tough crowd was a great fucking show but I really am worried that you couldn't have a show like that I know you should be in a shoe what I'm going to take a left right but who would be to blame for that that that's why I lean right and I think

and you doing some areas I mean you're an artist or stand up I cannot be I cannot vote with a party that is for sense of stripe and an for groupthink do we ever find out what's going on with Dennis Prager do we get a line on that just don't bother me cuz I like Adam I do to both of us got it. There's a lawsuit he's bringing a lawsuit that they think it's going to go a long way because they were labeling and show is hate speech maybe it's back up or whatever but I know that store you can find that anywhere there's a real concern that the ideologies Behind These tech companies all go in One Direction and they have the overwhelming control of the narrative because of the fact that they're all we're getting all of her information most people getting it on their phones most people are getting a lot of their media on their phone so the Netflix said something like 50% of the people that watch

my special watch it on a phone that's amazing I mean that's crazy that people are so that all this stuff is coming from these tech companies doesn't happen then that kind of body that it's the phone because when I hear that nothing matters of my specials but dump when I pick up somebody watching something I found the you don't have the full attention they're doing other things as opposed to sitting in front of the computer if you put all that work into it and that they're on the subway watching it and then I don't pay attention to when I can't control I don't to make me not to get over there

I'm going to have to give you a little

are mushrooms to show you better leave at 2 then it's almost five and a half hours to get down there took me fucking forever we'll just pull it up in Google just go out on the map if you just Google where you at, Palace punch him you know you know where he is

I don't show up I know you're going to throw that my friend you're racist piece of shit you fucking sex as to hate women feminism is cancer Kuchar females are the future the future is feminine

Chelsea horse anyways fucking hairy thick ankle girls are can't get laid and they turn their Angus and Miss pretty they just haven't met a strip of 3:45 right now 3 hours and 43 hours and 45 minutes to clock out if you leave right now you get there an hour before the show about and I'm just being honest what up what I'm saying when I'm nervous about is that it's going to get worse eating longer in the next hour making me nervous that you are nervous Diego on Saturday night I was delirious I've been drinking smoking and fucking fumes fumes from the highway cuz everything was Stop and Go the whole way I would rather run the jewels

not my car it was it was horrible drive and fly rates at 11 Ohio what do you like to work was like your favorite place to perform that's where I'm going to get you San Francisco tale of me wasn't the right yeah yeah they still playing up there like I have not seen as one that competition and then all of a sudden you know what stop people always say that I bet you kill down south and they all have guilt complexes about being racist and bigots so when you do something off-color

cowboy hats what about in Cleveland I don't know my sarcasm is almost there almost to Midwest really I don't do black jobs I'm just saying I don't know I got in trouble scratch that one off the list to that sounds like a great Club yeah yeah I'll get there I'm glad you stopped because I thought it's I want I want to clubs tonight

fun fun Chinese restaurant food there so it's connected to a rat it's not it's a good spot I love it so I'm doing that Sunday I'm not scared, this is

can I bring that 1500 year old school I want to give you some sort of protection and I want to give you a weapon place I can do 12 deep knee bends

what about if I get you the doctor that take care of you figure out what your blood levels are at the right by him for sure

get you out of these

are you got the marijuana yeah I know I heard it doesn't help you go to sleep or something that you one of those guys I took 1/8 of an edible unless it was like doing acid for me Bob Newhart can I listen I was in this in this fucking show and it was in black and wife and my wife was not my wife and my house was not my house and I got all this stuff is it from a little bit of an edible they're making their making Armstrong they're doing horrible things to people out here but now they have anybody measuring those fucking things how about the CBD Shelia and the problem was I had it already had a couple drinks so I couldn't tell by slept good when I took most of it

it's really good for your joints and for aches and pains and inflammation stuff like that for a lot of people's good for anxiety you know I don't have any of that it's cool as a cucumber wow amazing amazing that's what keeps me cool what about taxes do I work in Texas yes and some of the jokes that make people cringe elsewhere will getting Round of Applause in Dallas anytime I said but you know you say Jew I said it sounds like oh how come we first moved to New York I said I hear people saying yeah he's a joke whatever and nobody gets mad and stuff because in Boston if somebody said it but but Dallas was great for me

so this is great Austin's great I didn't know that was what I think someone had something there for a while I don't know the full story but that was one of the greatest clubs ever laugh stop in River Oaks of that crazy dude was running it the fox's name in Fox is named bald guy yes Mark yeah right Yeah Yeah Yeahs oddly enough well well well well they had a fucking legit open

Houston is a very eclectic City it's really different it's not what people think of Anna ticket Houston to take a look cowboy hats in order and it's very diverse is a lot goes very Urban is a lot of cool ship in Houston free artistic I'm a big fan yeah you don't chill in Atlanta if I want to put some of the ship that you right but that you have caused the following areas is more you know what about Phoenix Phoenix is it get to Phoenix

the comedy purpose is just to life in comedy for life and, it's a boy but has to involve comedy seven castles 7017 too many to look after

outside I like Texas I'm a big fan of taxes I live in Texas live in Colorado first though we'd like the man I love the the way it what it does for you there's something about being around Mountain said

was actually reading something about this that there's an actual thing that happens to people when you're faced with immense natural beauty that it diminishes your ego in yourself and it puts people in it what you want to hang glider a prospective be beat around mountains it's humbling is beautiful like the best-looking art you could ever see these are gorgeous mountain with some Green Hills in the sun coming out of the cloud so well that's good good to look at is anything that ever existed but when I see stuff like that when I get kind of you want to make up your mind I got something right here for you what is that

I know that's exactly what they are for

make up your mind about Joe if I can you show before stickler

nobody's got to get hurt just a little while

I don't be giggling in the car on the way down thrown up on myself maybe fun what's it what's going to happen should be legal everywhere

who do something really good for people problems you forget you take it sometimes in like an hour and a half late either one of us a scary Protank in San Diego I should go on the raft like everybody else does

last time I ran into I am so nervous that you get nervous if I'll be making my show in about 15 minutes really fucking nervousness I wish I was a but at least you have ways ways of put you on some funky Backcountry routes it'll cut 20 minutes out of it and up a Mexico very close to Mexico but super conservative that's what's interesting about San Diego military

they don't have one of those guys to my show tonight people are said to be like where would you live with you live in a military town like he asks that's at cuz she has to live you going to have gems for sure you definitely have gun ranges when you say that does that when they throw you into the off right Jason probably my God how horrible I know you're fucking extreme is job what next the Constitution likewise I'll look hairstyles and Chip tea, as I asked if there was a guy who got kicked off of a show

he was he was on the show I think was in Montreal and he had he had dreadlocks on and it was this he's apparently gender-fluid which I guess I dabbled in that you can go back and forth to being a man and woman but he does have dreadlocks so they kicked him out the show because of white guy with dreadlocks and he defended their position and one of the phrases that use was about decolonizing specific hairstyles and taking them away from white people and giving them back to the people that appropriation sweater accused

that no white goatee

Colin Quinn says I should wear a black he says I am a green Steve Jobs in a black Cadillac with a yellow lightning bolt and call myself John curotto

hi why does Serato I heard he has an amazing new show show up it's a it's all about politics it's about Bledsoe time late and shit and he's a he's a Craftsman I watch it by The Fat Black Pussycat I go on sometimes I have to show up to his what is the Fat Black Pussycat good fucking love just right around the corner from the Comedy Cellar it's got a real Bohemian failed to it people sitting in couches this lamps that holds about 75 people call it was a course quick enough and smart enough to say I'm using this every night to watch it out let people know you can say like I'm only charging you $5 because I'm going to be working new stuff out but you would love it and sends a Bohemian feel to it and it's and they give you the door not that that fact has I think it was you but it's great it's a it's an hour

have you I smoke wow it's so fun it's so

against like 75 seat is little cuz you guys are just hopping around like that in New York I could never afford to live in the city so live in New Rochelle and when I did gigs I was like pocket work in town and do 10 minutes 15 minutes or I could just go on the road and do a gig in Connecticut and make actual money in so I always did that never worked in New York every night but we made that plays world-famous and it's not any way you could work it out take your time but now it's no it's a fucking tourist it's packed it's still a great Club but I feel like you'll grow that I don't want to do I don't want to go on stage unless I'm doing at least forty minutes 15 minutes

what you're such a great thing so we can that nice yeah that's it it's tiny that's what I thought would bet that from the balcony up there at the store it's smaller than the store is 70 people upstairs so it's basically the same the one way about the parking lot of people sitting in couches and it's it's really cool that's the only one I really do like you I'd rather go to Governor's or somewhere else and do some real time 15 minutes

the thing about it is that it's not your crowd so you have to make people after they're just to see comedy then yes Apollo you know how that happens to some guys they develop their crowd and then they lose their ad yes fucking it's scary yes it's last time I saw you onstage I walked into Caroline's I was just I was just in town for something and you were onstage was a late show and you were doing so fucking Joe about Katrina a joke about Katrina and that they spelled help wrong on the road for the ice if you want have to step in that water you're standing

I was fucking cry laughing like Nick is just still swinging from the Headless my way that's my favorite joke that that stage is still one of my favorites in the country I don't know the problem Caroline's those when they reduce the stage down to the size of a fucking shooby yes but I bet on your absence adjustable but it is my fav I was so comfortable so much I could stay up here but I thought so, yeah yeah yeah yeah that's when you get in the crowd around isn't that night, club I'm in a real hole-in-the-wall shity tables and she just cheesy had the best time of my life becomes our show

do you have to work which I like at 12:45 or some shit like that means 20 people there and I always say that that's like truth serum because if you do your act in front of 20 people you know what sucks like there's no no confusing what sucks it's right front it's right I don't write you feel the terribleness of the material you don't need 250 people tell you suck it takes for couples you just but you feel it like you can kind of song and dance away through a couple under P that's right that is enough right right to work out material of course in your act you know because it's 7 don't like the joke or you fail it

is the 15th of someone sitting there with the cross arms staring it down like yeah that's where the work gets done Comedy Central specials on his kind of hot and I would sell out Caroline's I would hate it though like two shows on a Saturday night cuz it's packed and I know I have something called the asshole quotient Furby 20 coupon Club is one asshole so it feels like 250 somebody do the math so you're supposed to take your time on a Tuesday night from the 60 people and their real funny comes out when you in you put yourself in that frame of mine to when there's only 30 people and the midnight or something like that you're putting yourself in a different frame out there's no pressure

can you do that in front of a full room I can't put myself in that mentality card but I know damn well if I work is slow as I find a 40 50 people in front of 250 or 300 somebody's going to get anxious to meet at least that's my that meant a like you said when you show me 50 people it's almost like fucking around somebody's living room yeah yeah yeah and I want that feeling in front of 300 people 400 different you know we were talking about that last night that like when you do a large theater it's so much different to do in a club even if you do a pack Club of fiber in the people that you move to a place that's got five thousand people is in the air quotes act you got to do your act you know there's a weird but yeah time is different if you can't handle the punchline so you cannot club like a club you go punch remember Gavin would have contacted

we just have a buddy rule oh yeah well if he was doing 10,000 people that those tags would get dropped out of all the people around you I tried I tried tagging you know and like

like I said get lost in Burbank when was rapid fire and then I came in when I first thought of, and I step in the doors on stage and I'm like is he dying everybody off everything is doubled over in the audience I thought he was fucking. I'll send you know you couldn't hear me laugh that also know you drawer I mean cuz he would tag like you said was coming out of the shaking I think we got a chance to see some guys that are probably some of the best comics of all time and people don't know you know I think what you and Sweeney and Gavin and Lenny and those guys that we saw those guys were in their Prime and when we were young we got a chance to see I think some of the Great

I'll tell the guys that next put on a contract for good money and Coke

it'll make it home remedy of telling me they were making three grand a weekend and not having to leave your city of live great Nick's comedy stop you watch those guys get I remember Sweeney killing so hard you'll most wanted to quit, and then if there's no way I could do that but I haven't asked if he would be the host and and what was crazy it was great but tight 15

so it made me in whole fucking you have to be able to hold your own and they are really funny and they got heavy Boston Accents in their big men that like big imposing people and they would destroy some guy, and he was coming to mix for the weekend and everybody was dropping in cavan what do 10 chance length doing all this guitar and literally get like a standing ovation remember that what they would do it to the people on purpose Hollywood resume the Billy Crystal Philip Billy Crystal up in that room that I understand

they're like these guys that was funny as them I'm going to punish them and they didn't do it. Moreira exactly is going on, come home a couple years ago not the last one the one before that and Dom had to close the show and it was a murderer's row Bobby Kelly fucking me Billy Burke

taking the roof off the top and I'm like Dom has to close this and I'd pieces funnies anybody but I'm just saying how is he going to he goes up there and

you did something self-deprecating gets a nice within a minute and a half he had them and there was no drop-off there was no drop-off in response I went who I didn't realize he was that fucking good he's still got good has not lost at all the time

coming quit drinking for two months for happy for him he has hands was like shaking nerve issue it's actually it goes from a shoulder all the way down to his arm mushrooms they'll help him or her. That's what he said.

God damn I'm not even brought it up fuck did we but it honestly better get you out of here I have eat like I said I bore anytime Joey bosa's Popples anything out that TV radio and I do that flights just makes me mentally ill I get it I fucking almost started crying halfway out here I just got a guy next to me sucking on a straw like a six-year-old license glasses nothing in it it's a hundred and ten degrees on the plane baby behind me screaming like somebody was using the soft spot on his head for fucking ashtray I can't make the shut up, I was almost crying but you know what I got to come out of more than once every two years ya feel haven't come out yet I'll do it for the rest of the world can I plug my podcast just go to Nick dip.com and Monday through Thursday at 6 p.m. Eastern

it streams live on the free on Monday and Wednesdays and I just shot a think I'll stick man and October to buy instructional baseball clinic that you know he's in it and Andrews partner already saw some stuff to Netflix and it came out killer Stickman it's really testosterone-driven so it's like it like it's Nick dip.com for my show tonight at the comedy Palace Sunday night at Ventura Harbor comedy club Chinese restaurants it's fucking awesome and what am I forgetting I don't forget something Instagram or Twitter all that stuff in March at the house Hall in New York I think I'm just going to put that without the use your what you told me just flood the market with it even charge me just let it out there

I love you man always good to see you

thank you everyone for tuning in to the show and thank you to our sponsors thank you to zoom Video Communications meet happy with zoom Video Communications and go and visit Zoom. Us to set up your free account today that's Zoom. Us set up your free account and check out some of the best damn video communicating you're ever going to say we're also brought to you by the cash app haha the cash application gentleman wait till you fucking see how easy it is to save with cash apps boosts it is a wonderful thing and you can save 10% or more at Whole Foods Chick-fil-A Chipotle all these different spots save a dollar off every time you get coffee at Dunkin or Starbucks or any coffee shop across the country and you can download the cash app for free get a cash car

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