#1126 - Erik Griffin
Jun 4, 2018
Erik Griffin is a stand-up comedian, writer and actor. His new special "AmERIKan Warrior" premieres on June 8 on Showtime, and he can be also be seen in the Showtime show "I'm Dying Up Here."
Yeehaw latest German how's everybody doing got a lot of Comedy dates I'm doing soon on the road I'm headed to Vancouver August 24th tickets available for the tickets are of my face tickets available for Boise Idaho June 30th and a bunch of other places we added an extra day to Calgary Joe Rogan. Com tour for all that good stuff but I'm moving a lot of stuff happening not moving but you know I'm saying I'm on the move this episode of the podcast brought to you by Omaha Steaks I've been eating these things I sent them to me folks and they're yummy Father's Day is just around the corner if you try to find the perfect gift for Father's Day if your dad love the grill but you hate the hassle and poor quality at the grocery store what better way to kick off grilling season then by gifting and Omaha Steaks Father's Day package to dad the delicious
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► 00:01:59Jones to beefy top sirloins for chicken fried steaks to boneless pork chops for all beef Omaha Steak Burgers for Gourmet Franks 12 oz of all beef Meatballs 1 lb of Steak House prize for caramel apple tartlets and Omaha Steak seasoning packet plus you get four more Grill ready Omaha Steak Burgers free with purchase again this limited-time package for only 49 99 and go to Omaha steaks.com type Rogan in the search bar and add Father's Day package to your car don't wait the offer and soon go to Omaha steaks.com type Rogan in the search bar and grab your dad and fire up the grill we're also brought you by Squarespace which is the host of Joe Rogan. Com and it is a fantastic resource if you need a website you can make your own website and you could do it easily if you can do normal shit on a computer like add a photo to an email or move files around on a desktop you can make
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► 00:05:06download the cash app reward code Joe Rogan one word you will receive $5 in the cash app will send $5 to Justin Brands fight for the Forgotten charity build Wells for the pygmies in the Congo that's it my guess today is my good friend Eric Griffin he's a fucking hilarious stand-up comedian he is on the Showtime series I'm dying up here he's been on Workaholics and he has a Showtime special that is out this Friday June 8th he's awesome I love them give it up for Eric Griffin
► 00:05:42The Joe Rogan Experience
► 00:05:51live ever Griffin so we were talking before this podcast how you mix it up with the Android watch but the Apple phone very curious I love the Android in the watch is greater love how it interacts but then I get a girlfriend who has an iPhone Ryan's like I want to FaceTime with you she wants to get Skype Skype app that you can understand why does in the sand which lets you hook up your phone but you can't really interact with it you can't like talk or anything but it's actually kind of nice you just want to know stuff going on it's probably all we're saying it's probably better that you can interact with it cuz Jamie was telling me that they you could do walkie-talkie with your iPhones now it'll still be announced right now so I don't know all the details but the worldwide developers conference is going on
► 00:06:51WWDC Southern Nosh new operating system the new Apple watch the new all that like automatic workout detection walkie-talkie mode and something else is going to just too much to leave it at my phone I don't bring my phone with me cuz it seems like you want to go where you're missing out of sand are on our way now when you do that it's just cuz you're looking at a text message so now it's just as rude as this isn't helping. Helping when I go if I have no idea it was really weird about all the stuff the phones in that how we talked to everybody wants to text I knew you can't get people to call you
► 00:07:51Ellen from the amount now they're putting like Gifts of real people but this is how I feel, putting putting a celebrity up but this is how I feel today how you feel today. Chris Pat Pratt word we're slowly getting back to where it's going to be we're going to actually be talking to a real person think so Emoji of yourself called me Mochi Samsung
► 00:08:38we're trying to find ways to be more ourselves
► 00:08:42you don't need an emoji of yourself just do it yourself each other on Samsung a iPhone the iPhone was the first of these kind of things the first iPhone but Androids are real close now they're real close I mean it like that on an Android you can do it I know I'm drunk
► 00:09:23Tamela Mann you get an Android FaceTime thing there's something that's on the right away they have their own version of feel like a Google pixel phone that they might have but I don't think enough people have a Google pixel phone to make that even a thing a really really popular me I have one you know you do not have a Google can I do have one but you don't use it I could get text messages to work this is the scam because you are hooked up to this I would have told me Jamie
► 00:10:23does Android video calling does that only work with Android Android to Android look like they don't just work together why doesn't Apple exactly just work together a text message to iMessage thing as would fuck me because everybody knew that I had an iPhone so they would send me cuz they have an iPhone dude send me an iMessage and so I was sending people text message like I'm not getting it I'm like send me one and they would send me one and I wouldn't get it and so then I went online and looked it up and it said you have to disable iMessage okay so I disable iMessage then you have to call up you have to actually call up someone I'm done after you have to call up someone to tell them to take your email address off of the I message database
► 00:11:16okay so I do that and they take this email at why you doing that to her because I switched over to an Android phone is like pause like I just fucking kill between I just one of millions of people out there you don't know anything about me why do you care why won't you give a fuk on the phone felt bad that I was switching over so then it still wouldn't work I mean it didn't work for Dad get like one out of three text messages and it all happened while I was on vacation I just figured I'm going to try this phone while I'm on vacation fuck around but you can't think they got you roped in with that God damn that I messaged shit and all that come to life for Android you know the difference between the Androids though is that Samsung does not update their software very often they're up to
► 00:12:16update security patches but I know me too but Google pixel phones get the latest software right when it gets released and so like when Oreo comes out and 8.1 all these different operating systems come out there better supposedly looking for how long week I mean it takes a long time for they come out on Samsung phones long time like 6 months sometimes it takes a long time breaking news your Android and pure Android you really only get with the pixel unless you can do you know about how do you do you like can you hack them you can have them right when you go on break, now on Verizon
► 00:13:16Verizon stuff heading to all these other types of apps however I want $200 a month for you stupid phone or service and then I'm getting you started mother fuckers
► 00:13:49that's also weird operating systems because I remember Windows phone is like Windows 10 Windows 10 looks with tiles game Bryant how many people have Windows computers so amazing that Windows had a phone and people are the problems with their computer yeah but I stopped when I can't remember the last time I had a Windows computer I strictly went out because it's just so easy to use and it's still not easy to use
► 00:14:49apple does not have good keyboards like if you have a desktop keyboard at home and you can add a second keyboard you know I like by a mechanical keyboard if you like to write did the problem and apple keyboards is there's no key travel it's very very shallow so it's like a just a tiny movement click click click click click what are uses I use a ThinkPad and then one of the reasons why use the ThinkPad is there's like travel to these keys keys keys have motion to them like if you feel like so as you're typing I can just look at the screen and I don't want to have to look down at the keyboard and they've depressed with your fingers like you you have there's motion to it so there's no accidental pressing the keys did you take typing in high school I don't remember any of it though my high-school you was the last year that they had typing at my school
► 00:15:49they just they were saying like this is no longer cuz I ain't they had a computer class that they were starting I just thought damn like I look back on these things and I just go wow there's a how times have changed our generation is this like generation that is like we went through the first of all of these things I had a Commodore 64 did you know yes I remember the first Apple laptop I remember I remember like when game systems changed and color TV and call waiting and like all the things that you know their answering machine 976 numbers and you know I like all all that stuff was bisects line I was going to call the Christmas one first and then I was going to call a sex one and then I called the Christmas one person to my mom picks up the other line and I hang up and then my mom's like are you talking to Santa
► 00:16:48oh shit how old are you trying to get out of jail so I can even just be different now like yeah thinking about you talking about this keyboard is still have a little bit of old-school to it has an old-school feel to what you're saying you know you still have a anytime somebody using Windows I know it's like oh they're they're connected to the Past still I just switched over to a recently when I walked around with a ThinkPad one day and I was like wow this keyboard is so much better cuz I have a MacBook to Windham new Macbook Pros and just you just can't handle it's not good keyboard the shit it's it's not just bad it's shit shit shit and there's no options like if you want a laptop they don't give you options to do You Can't customize the windows
► 00:17:48the hook I'm sure the desktop the problem is most of my shit I go in the third class action lawsuit over MacBook Pro keyboard fraudulent concealment see but look at that keyboard look out fucking shit that's bullshit yeah but make it a little thicker Jesus Christ who gives a fuck if it's a extra half a millimeter if it you have good keyboard feel I mean it depends on what you're doing if you're the type of person just write an email every now and then but I fucking right I need a keyboard but I still go online if I'm just just web-surfing fine for that but it sucks a fat one deals with
► 00:18:48what song is going to like but the only time my phone is blowing up like this before is when that Justin Bieber posted a picture with him I was shaking shaking her for a month straight like a thousands of notification of government if you really wanted to like if he got political tonight that's a problem 24 right what the fuck is he is easier than 24 million dollars and no parental supervision you do some dumb shit to do way worse right now I would do a lot of dumb shit if you gave me a hundred million dollars just out of nowhere I don't know where
► 00:19:48prefer this is what he is you know the kind of Fame to that guy possessive he's off the charts famous yeah we can't get rid of the Electoral College though by the way not to get political but does help but let me did he react that mean you can't play the game Electoral College you just have to be popular in Iowa popular in Ohio no I don't do that just go in and talk about Muslims shake your fist online voting for like-for-like are with your phone like you have to have a phone and then you register your phone so that thing in my number that your phone has is it is strictly for you they already have what do you call it like facial recognition software their phones have fingerprint register
► 00:20:48how do you say volts should be like Columbia DVD how I don't want this phone I don't want the numbers of people that put if people know where talk about Colombia DVDs were old but back in the day you would sign up for like cassette tape yes and they would send you a bunch of cassettes like you pick like Aerosmith check it out so they don't just send it automatically cuz people quitting the service you had like safe 3 days and if you if you didn't send it back they would charge you the $9 so that's why I'm saying about voting this is how we should vote
► 00:21:48candidates for Democrat and if you don't give me up 3 days to pick if you don't pick your vote goes to them $5 for like to sound like that okay free shipping is only eligible for the two more DVDs of a sub total of $35 pre orders are not eligible for free shipping okay so the free shipping but it's not free shipping is that what they're doing and they say it's 95 so to plusses what for because it has to be more than $35 you fucking Crocs are so gross dude I've been talking to people that had Steven Tyler and he was explaining what happens now what streaming service was great by the way he's great
► 00:22:48surprised when someone like that was that type of Personality I'm not surprised that you see the kind of life and career he's had those people aren't they're not above the norm super sweet guy too nice to everybody just a hug and everybody and real friends list that famous and at the time when people are treating you like just a God you know everywhere Rockstar professional athlete but you think they have to be dicks no no no here's my theory about that is that the the fame that level of Fame is overwhelming at you all the time so you just develop is Dickie things to keep people away from you or
► 00:23:48Steven Bieber me that there's a level where you can go anywhere and I've been I've been around Beaver I don't think you trust anyone and that level of Fame where you're just also used to you know he gave me a water get the car I want to go here when you get used to it that becomes normal just telling people he says if you give me a give me a vodka is it give me a box of thing and then I went I was like okay
► 00:24:32I guess I was so mad at myself and then out when I gave it to him I thought I should have said no I thought I should stop saying I was at the Laugh Factory and he was there he was watching scooter who's your buddy my Scooter Braun you know scooter comes down you know when he says he would like to see you and I'm not at first I was like, no walk Summit me
► 00:25:17I went a little like I'm a fan of all types of music so I'm not that the kids Dynamic is the famous just by the way in defense of a fast you can't tell somebody they're great you're great at Wendy's 9 you're great you're great you're great I think about that then that 13 is probably when he first went well am I at 18th and then when he finally said everybody goes bro
► 00:26:02tone it down it's too late the monsters already been let loose mature adult and he probably has no, left in his body at any given time it's just all day long since recovery time for him if he tweeted I need some pussy tonight would be like American Idol auditions Guatemala volcano eruption ever seen that or people are running from the smog it's fucking crazy girls guys coming down the mountain headed towards you it's it's that Guatemala ruption is fucking scary man there's nothing like that anything comedy other than that yeah he's close he's close but even that looking at a squat Amala most violent eruption in more than a hundred years 25 people already dead I just think it just happened yesterday
► 00:27:01it's a fucking crazy many people died after erupted the a Sunday just getting back at us that's to write Hawaii and this one we got to be real fucking careful New Zealand hasn't had a couple do they have like a live volcano in New Zealand has the most volcanoes in the world Islands captain cook cook islands make up which is why I love place and it's just all American I got to go to Ensenada and you know I don't want to be around yeah yeah yeah I'm like a Beverly Hills Beverly Hills. Jesus Christ
► 00:28:0160 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 volcanoes that right
► 00:28:13yeah yeah that isn't saying I'm telling you right now beautiful vacation I didn't like actually like semen like I want to Upland I thought I'm driving around downtown LA like Seattle or beaches are stunning I want to look at my hotel window and the sliding door and like this and then like the water is like right there more Mountains rainforest Urban Jungle that we live in all the time you're going to Costa Rica I have been to go out. Just want to Costa Rica with my girlfriend we just started to get together and it was it was good
► 00:28:59how many how long were you guys dating you know it was like Christmas time and I'm I'm with her I let me make this special so we go to Costa Rica you know I do it up and she went with you not the Family Stone Age people so I don't go see my mom will move to just move to Malaga in Spain Spain we got to come back here cost of living is so low I do living like kings over there like a great two bedroom condo with like a Malibu top view 600 year old month
► 00:29:59I'm telling you right now look up the cost of living in Spain lot of people from Britain they retire in Spain because our money goes a lot further yeah it's a lot of stuff so I swear like you can get room service 24 hours I got sick Joe oh no it was diarrhea sick or what kind of said it was every hole in my body something with coming out of it okay and then I'm meeting is a comic you I'm making it I made a joke and her that she didn't appreciate she was mad at me about this joke but I'm also telling her like the time I'm not feeling well and then it happened I get up and I want it and then there's nothing I vomit in my hands I run to the bathroom and then it's just like it's coming out of both
► 00:30:59and the way she was acting all my God resolve the issue and by the time I was like I can't be with somebody else it's not going to
► 00:31:17she ordered room service while I was asleep while you're sick wow
► 00:31:23cheeseburger but then she was mad at you for your jokes and my gain. Something's going on with you know how we say we get with her mother you know you know whatever the qualities are no she didn't like it she got to meet you know you just are dating someone and you go on vacation with them and it goes sour and you stuck with them for like 5 days and some spot and it usually happens by the way on the plane ride over
► 00:32:23you're like oh I don't like you and we're going to be on this plane for 6 more hours and then you need to go to get to this hotel travel make sure like I want to go out and do things that you want to like leave the hotel or maybe you're not maybe your person at like wants to take advantage of everything in the hotel are you on vacation if you want to chill that have to be established or you going to be in a situation when you're like
► 00:32:53I like margaritas by the beach and so far we survived it you know we got it I don't know if it's going to be over we're coming up on a year yeah we're coming up on The View
► 00:33:23fucking fault you're on stage talking about your great family and just something about shooting live ones in there making I'm thinking about like you know what maybe it's time now I'm like I want to share this with someone that really cares about me and I and one thing I'll say for a sheet she I feel the love you know it's awesome loving woman. Very beautiful and so she got used to you after while and understand how to fight the fight Aldo fight it was obviously I was like when communicating I told her what she did she downloaded communicating with your man audiobook
► 00:34:23and shoot and we sat and listened to it together and it was like that's why I quit about which I could check it was like the guy that wrote the book was talking about her
► 00:34:41what about you like you like something like you know
► 00:34:45Amanda's don't have the look on your face of disgust when you when you're mad it was like all these things and then it was one moment I'm going like this I have my hands in the air and it was like a man's body language
► 00:34:58time to back off and I was like the gesture of being like hey I need to improve I need to like change how I feel or are like if you don't let me look at it self self reflect the view that the active that self-reflection with her that that was that's fake speak volumes for her and her character it really made me go okay you really want to you want to make this work but that's awesome that age should not have said that
► 00:35:44her name is trouble cuz she she princess a little iffy right it's weird how we just make rules as to how old someone can be to be with someone else but it changes after a while right like once you get like if the dude is like 90 and the woman's 50 we don't go far kid whatever I would say to me like you know that she's at the cusp of it I think that was the one that gets to like 28 29 30 and then this the other part it doesn't matter
► 00:36:44are you in your life so I go I have to remember that this is her hustle years so you start doing stand-up a 30 Harley twenties cuz my mom is one of the support of women I said hey Mom what I think I'm going to be a comedian next day I'm signed up at the UCLA extension you know with a notebook in my shoes like I said I want to be a rock climber my mom was like okay let's see what about ropes and like hook me up with that she wanted me out of the house when I was young and so I went to the Top by Sandy Shore oh Jesus
► 00:37:43look at you wow this this mother fucker right here boy
► 00:37:54how good was the advice I misspoke if you go to Comedy class just for the comfort of the environment in the support class but after that you got to do it on your own but I suggest one comedy class right I went and I love that and then by the way the showcase for the graduation was at The Comedy Store in the or so the first time I ever did stand up comedy was in the OR at The Comedy Store you know it was like 90 something that knows what happened to 93 and you know what I remember specifically was like after our show they just rolled into the or show first guy ask Carlos Mencia he goes on and at the time he was like enough
► 00:38:54Taco Bell that is fucking hilarious I think I can do this you know you know you know how that goes Its support of people in the crowd and you know I have my my funny hockey jokes that I was doing at the time just my new what I thought was new I remember one of my jokes was like I was like I can't recognize Superman heading out to take my glasses off you know like I know black people on Jeopardy that was another one of my jokes that's a good one so I had like I'm going to have black categories on Jeopardy in a blind singers barbecue holidays you know I haven't I was killing Batman with that shit baby so real show with that shit and you just gets crickets but you like but an open mic night it's weird I like this open mic night material where does okay on Open Mic nights and you like this is some good man
► 00:39:54I just got to develop it I don't even think it's even open mic in front of a crowd this is what happens when you go in the Middle America when you first or coming up and you are still a major headliner and then a local guy I'll be there going to be on Joe Rogan show in Iowa and he's going to be performing in front of people it's going to kill what those people then that person now thinks that this is how you do it and I bring that to LA and New York and then they're like being like a thousand other Comics doing you know talking about the same subjects and then realize how they had to find some originality and what they're doing and that's the hard part that's the hard part. The first, to get married and have daughters but this experience that you had is is it is personal to you and conveying
► 00:40:54is the hard part you know it's just surface with their material it's hard to start out like you your promises are so short and then you go from one short promise to another short promise and then becomes it it becomes a bit and then becomes you know a set in the now you're talking about until Comics like that it's like music you know if you heard if you heard like a Neptune's beat you can hear from what you can know when you hear it you go oh I bet you the Neptunes produced that track or or premiere of the DJ Premier, your comedy's the same way when you're working on things you work on it in your way that if you looked at all your material you might now see the common thread and that's how you put
► 00:41:54gather an act 30 minutes 40 minutes to talk about a subject for so long because we not woven together these thought that we don't think are connected but when we look at it this something that you flows into this and it connects very nicely so that that's what was going on so I'm watching again I'm watching Mencia at the time that I'm just young and I don't know what to do next I just had a great I thought and now I'm looking at these professionals and I saw him and I was like I saw him when we talked about Taco Bell and stuff I thought I think I could do this you know and he brought up Chris Tucker
► 00:42:35and and Chris Tucker went on stage and I was thought to myself I don't think I could do this just the way he was so like what is boys home for salmon I thought I don't know and I didn't know what to do so I flaunt it around I did open my eyes that I do so powerful I don't I just want to have it man I was just nervous and scared because I was a funny guy so that I would go to open mics and then the same people doing the same shit over and over and over again then I wouldn't go to another Open Mic for another 4 weeks and then I see the same people and I thought what how do you get from here how do you get on you know that no one and I didn't know if there's no mentors people going to help you with this you know you couldn't even talk to someone like that of your stature at all I cannot the time you could just be some open Mike and I'll buy the way they shouldn't do that you know I mean like The Comedy Store in some dude
► 00:43:35you just kind of like what do you want to talk to me about right now dude you just started everybody that's different that's different but like there's a sort of even still like it's like I don't know if it's so appropriate for a door guy to come up to you and be like yo Irvine you don't tell Mitch I don't know I don't know you at all I have friends with Christmas coming up I want the job trying to be open for you, Juggernaut is that what you said I told him I was a Gemini I told him yeah that's what I thought you were supposed to do
► 00:44:35you know so I don't know I didn't know what I was doing you know what I don't know how to what are you supposed to do I grew up in a way I was born and raised in that way so I'm in La trying to get on the stage where I go to the last night I was telling you earlier I saw you at the you know just like you were on stage like I'm not like you were just giving it a certain energy you had about what you were talking about that I was like damn what happened to this guy
► 00:45:12play I remember the first time I was like man some woman hurt him or that's hilarious or something some sun manga Carnival tapped into that so it took a long time for me to realize I know this is what I want to do in like hello that's the funny part is I just can't tell a story that have you captivated is no anger no like screaming emotions cigar is just chill out but like you know you have a jail mode know you're on there it's going to be powerful have you ever just going on and kind of like not done it that way but then
► 00:46:12how to get laughed at a completely different point and you're set with no material for sure I could you try to find the material up to fail sometimes I got onto a bit slower and I'll go into a bit more casual and try to wrap it up rather than like try to make it like sometimes especially when you first start out of gate with lot of momentum so I can kind of Coast with it English on the cue ball
► 00:46:49because sometimes you just your ham it up the funny looking guy you know but I know that like that I could do a thing that they're going to are they laughing at what I'm talking about like are they going with me emotionally intellectually or they just don't recognize that yeah right like what do you want from them today wanna do you want to connect with them do you want them to laugh do you want both do you want them to appreciate you they just just want him to have a good time for two weeks and wanting to laugh at how you are connected to what you're talking about cuz that's different to political comic people might laugh that like how passionate you are about being a
► 00:47:49libertarian or how passionate you are about you know being an atheist maybe they don't agree with you or maybe they do agree with you but they just stood there laughing at how you are connected to what you're saying and I think that that's another element that's a nice a whole other thing you know I look at all my friends that you know we are we allowed appears of our friends that we just got like that they all have something different in that way you know it's an amazing thing to watch as a crazy art form because nobody can tell you how to do it sound like any other art form be in a rock band or you can be in a blues band country music and everybody would be clearly defined as I know that but I do think that it is similar to music in that we're not going to change the rules of communication
► 00:48:49Chords it's still going to be a b c d g you know what I mean and I didn't get those are not going to sound good no matter what you have, just like just being able to communicate your points and I think one of you are person that can communicate your points and they're solid in clear then the joke's on top of that or what the entertainment is going to be but you still gotta like me when somebody says telling the story and nobody says anything that's a horrible video say that
► 00:49:27schedule B that cocksucker
► 00:49:32well I want to be there bro it's like wrong with someone you say set up that is important you have to certain styles of Comedy I guess there's so much really country you just here you know right away there's some country music of Comedy
► 00:50:32is never
► 00:50:36it was story The anguish I don't think that's what I was doing at this time
► 00:50:44are you trying to look back at things are different now like I don't know if you have what your body fat count right now I don't get it checked that's that's probably better be better just think that it's better than it probably is but you might be disappointed the last time I checked it was 10% of 35% body fat but my blood pressure is good that's good man. When should I go to the boxing thing and it's like I go to gloveworks Works in Century City
► 00:51:44I was asking me about going to boxing it's change my perception of women women in the box that shit is cheese good you can handle yourself all my preconceived notions of like and it said that stupid a stupid mail thing is to see a woman fighting somebody hurt her you know you got a lot of that in you
► 00:52:29this is this we just dislike therapy it's cuz I'm working on it man I just gave your old house or the Box he's been cool I like it's fun workout you know and then tell me send me a picture and shoes and she's I don't know who the lady is out but I'm not familiar with her she wasn't fighting UFC but she's got blood on her and she's going like this is she standing up over this chick damn that is an angry woman I can't do those kind of
► 00:53:29start in August I was watching women hit each other you know I just don't like it I don't know maybe that's my mail thing you know but I think it like how can we be in a society where we talked about no violence against women unless it's pay-per-view like violence against women by men is what that woman that beat up Ronda Rousey Amanda Nunez I fight better than her so fuck you up the fuk me up that's Amanda Nunez
► 00:54:12what Rousey in the face in society for the rest of my life but this woman who trains and is like a beast beat her up I just I can't get the disconnect so I don't understand what you would wear you missing the connection there such a big difference between I guess first of all how big is a heavyweight UFC fighter going out to get to the Killer
► 00:55:12me want to punch her happened and that's the first time I had a girl like you in a girl and I was like oh but you don't remember everybody hated her like a second ago then all of a sudden so I knew it that when I saw you can't do that I would learn it before it gets ugly before it gets a little. This is so vivid in my head that she immediately went from strong like I run this Courtyard to
► 00:56:10picture of me and I was like just happened want to look her up her life
► 00:56:21it was Condoleezza Rice that you might like that. That would be crazy she's angry you for punching her all the time starting Ward Syria and shit but I'm saying it could happen okay I'm with Rhonda the difference between W punch and ronda's that would be the last punch whoever threw how did she flip you on your head on the concrete mud puddle
► 00:56:44video all they would say is
► 00:56:49domestic abuser mixed martial arts Champion she's a champion and one of the greatest female champions of all time I didn't like seeing her face look like she shouldn't have thought that woman I just I didn't like seeing you I didn't feel any of that I didn't feel any of the competition if she turned around and I saw is a bruised and battered woman that's what I saw yesterday that's when she got head kick it was knuckles in the face that was a quick fight and she just got the fuck beat out of her not fight but you can fight in MMA and there's danger and its consequences but if you're in shape and you're prepared
► 00:57:49actually you can fight but there's a lot of women that weren't prepared correctly and Ron the fuck them up that's just how it goes that's so mean sometimes you're the hammer sometimes you're the hammer sometimes you're the nail y'all it was like it was a money marketing it was great marketing tool she only has a lot of a lot of it was based on what you've been able to accomplish it wasn't based on bullshit it was based on her actual performance inside the Octagon against people like cats and gone oh against people like Sara McMann was supremely impressive but you put but we love a champion wheel of undefeated love being the best ever going into that fight and it didn't look like that that shouldn't have been behind are going into that fight maybe the Holly Holm fight fight she was under massive amounts of distraction
► 00:58:49she was under she was there and they were going to do Roadhouse remember there going to be a Roadhouse movie she's having meetings with a Jason and they just thought she can fuck up anybody on the plants the problem is unless you are a hundred percent all in with your training and you're learning in your development you're making sure you got the right training Partners in the right coaching and the right staff and nutrition all these different things if you don't if you have any any part of that missing then the people coming up who have all those bases covered they're going to surpass you would happen with her your knee deep in the world you know everything about it okay as a lay person just looking at them standing next to each other I was like why why do you think that I don't know
► 00:59:49bigger than this person Sara McMann Ronda stop Sara McMann and one brown Sara McMann was an Olympic silver medalist in wrestling and she's a tank I wasn't into it like that maybe if I seen that I would have been like you could fight that was my first time I just looking at here just you hear you guys talking this isn't going to go well and then sure enough it didn't go well that made me have like it's the respect level for female fighting if I'm just coming in by the river I hear this is
► 01:00:49what's a sport that was a big blow for female fighting good to know that anyone can lose even the Great's even the greats. Boxing that something there's so many different ways to win at the top of the food chain is will two guys could be who's the lightweight champion is undefeated. Mauled everybody except Al iaquinta when the distance with them and you know but still beat his ass but still beat him but Jon Jones is really undefeated Jon Jones has one last tribute to disqualification is he the guy that's been disqualified because he was on drugs or something and how did he get in it in the system we don't know
► 01:01:49for a very short amount of time there's a lot of speculation we don't until that gets ironed out with one of my good friends in the whole wide world he's also a UFC MMA fighter a check people's ears so that's a good move yeah yeah but sometimes about the work
► 01:02:23I don't know if I know but I might be like you
► 01:02:35no joke I say one quick the first time I ever box. I was like a I went with Craig Robinson and he was like in his 60s old school black with him the guy he was in there you don't have my car and then he hit me in the head job to do and it was like 30 seconds left and if I did he put his hands up he was like
► 01:03:16where is the fight with Ronda Street
► 01:03:27Aladdin box again for a little while to resubmit it was how can these people throw 50 punches I'm going to drop something I thought about doing one a while ago but it has it has reached a level of success that he is comfortable and now you're starting to seem like not everyone needs to know everything it's not just that there's a value in doing things just for you not to just working on stuff and doing things just publicly in this day in age everybody does everything
► 01:04:27real disbenefit like why do you do the things you do like why I do the things I do for two birds one either I enjoy them or I think they make me better they make me a better person like I do a lot of yoga yoga today and I do it I do it a lot more the reason why I do it I think it makes me a better person I think it makes me more mellow which I think is good I have a tendency to not be my mellow it makes me more friendly I think it calms me down and I think it's very good for my body so I do it all the time but I'm not about to do some fucking yoga video I got to stand up for that reason, he calms you down yeah that's what I like silly like I might go on a stage
► 01:05:27are the ice house I wanted to do this I was going to open mics and then I went to Long Beach. Just please call that a laugh is hope this guy Steve Kimbrough had this really shity Club on the Queen Mary I did that and then I started doing the Ice House Annex that's a good room but they had that 3 shows on Friday music shows on Saturday I went to the haha then I was like hosting on the weekends and then Terry love Terry from the hog and I was God bless her soul Tony Hinchcliffe on the show tonight I went to the house and then I got to showcase at The Comedy Store you know I miss you didn't even look at me
► 01:06:27didn't even talk to me what year this was it was a year past so I say she was fucking face
► 01:06:42the same day and she passed him and it went down like it that's why I thought I was really pissed me off this must have been 2,000 2,000 3 ish so this is when Jay was on tourgasm would think I was supposed to Showcase that night too but he refused to Showcase and then friend I'm at a med showcase that night and I didn't get passed to a year-and-a-half you know
► 01:07:42what people get on him, but his Madness you know and it maybe if he didn't even know it it worked for me because he was my Village he was my enemy okay so I had to get past him he was the gatekeeper I had to get past so it took me a year and a half of like doing belly room and it just hanging around and people keep saying to him hey you should put Eric Griffin you know another showcase it was in the main room during one of those bringer shows they were doing the showcases during those and she was there they had I did my set I ran the fucking light to know they fuck this what year was talking about I'm not sure when it was you know and then as I'm leaving their they're bringing her through the main room and they're helping her through the hallway to go to the kitchen
► 01:08:42she stops if she looks at me and says you were funny who knows the only words he ever spoke to me that's all you need that's all I needed and then Tommy comes over in a while ago she passed you you're in the belly room now I needed the challenge you know my best moments for me personally Richard over a copy of magic
► 01:09:30you go there not to do, you go to hang out with so I passed me so Maz jobrani this is a years later before I pull my dick out walking down the hallway and we laugh a little bit little bit of murder it and then I'm headed to The Green Room white working at my club why don't I know you at that moment Richard is in the hallway and then I look at Richard and I go
► 01:10:28I play churches I played cruise ships I'm a professional comedian my point about this is that moment of him squirming and like being like okay you're in it after that I was in that was worth waiting for as opposed to like trying to bully my way into places and since then Rich and I were friends you know it's like I had to like find the right moment I had to like you know I do not have been good I've been on the road before possibly do you know Joey like he went up we talking about sniffing his balls and one too many cock sucker stick his nose up girls asses was broke down on the line
► 01:11:27and and they will just fuck it first while he was murdering to the point where like drinks are falling off tables and lights are dimming they're shorting out and my cuz you know Mike's the sweetest guy in the world because I love you I think you're amazing because but I can't have you in this club yes nobody can't work but Joey was already Successful by then he just would work you know Joey always works with me so he just didn't want to do it
► 01:11:59this yeah I got one of them one of my favorite phone calls I've had is Joey Diaz calling me the other day he is no I don't do this cock sucker you know I don't you worry your pretty good on I'm dying up here and you just giving me, and I just don't and I was like when it's coming from someone that you've believe is 100% genuine in any way the way he was talking about it I thought I was like oh that's great that's what you want that's why I learned when I got back into it later too by the way when I was 30 I knew that you had to get the respect of your peers these people that you do this business with have to think you're funny cuz those are the people that going to get you work at the like you just like you too that's a big one the one who sings this nice about The Comedy Store for sure is that I think in this is our trip to the internet because I think what's going on with the internet now so many opportunities for the commute for comedians now that we're not in
► 01:12:59competition with each other anymore ever been used to be like that like there was a lot of people back then that felt like save you got something like you got a TV show where can I get that fucking show the people that thought there was a limited number of things that's what I call Fam and thinking you've heard that expression to poison to your life in the way you think about the world that a lot of people have that problem that famine thinking nothing people still feel like that now but I've always always liking it to golf you know I think we're on the leaderboard but we're still fighting against ourselves at the Mexican Decor competing you're still competing for the championship is not competing at The Comedy Store in the world there's so many opportunities are so many places to work so many standing Light Special you doing the road is so many theaters clubs somebody there still only 52 weeks in a year
► 01:13:57think about that how many Headliners are there in in in do you think
► 01:14:06I'm not joking I've okay I got your place maybe worldwide might be 500 Club though it's only 52 weeks one guy is still still still have fight after man do I get those two last time you did a Thursday night at a club store
► 01:15:06write the clubs so they're still just because I just got tired of the find me more than anything is doing morning radio where you had to get up early in the morning and then you try to get some sleep and you never could and then you just wrecked and then the only time you didn't want anymore it's always the same thing as a guy there's something psychic and some places I don't know I mean I'm talking out of my ass
► 01:15:42wake me up at 5 in the morning if you don't get good sleep doing three nights in a row in different places I want to work I just didn't you got at the third night in a row if that's okay because you're getting up in the morning the same hotel room but when you get up you have to go to the airport and then take a shower go to the gym try to wake up it's not even a part of my thing like you know you you just you use you said I get up go to the gym that one man fly somewhere if I fly in I put my fucking bad down I unzip it I take my shorts out I put my fucking running shoes on or whatever I'm going to where I go right to the gym
► 01:16:42the gym I don't fuck around because if I don't I'm not going to do it whatever it is the gym elliptical machine into a half an hour just make it make it make yourself sweat you know what I like to do this spot with reading
► 01:17:16try to get that pussy pussy get the moment that they go through your bag that there is no he traveled with a briefcase none of the briefcase a suitcase filled with dildo and rubber fist snow is Chick-fil-A opened up his bag and like what is it and they can't say shit because sex toys aren't outlawed have you seen how crazy these sex robots are looking yes but I have this feeling we have about
► 01:18:17self-driving cars is it did a fear out there about self-driving cars we're not there yet it's not going to be our generation to fully Embrace is it for 10-15 years away from like this is going to be a normal thing this the same thing with the sex dolls I think you're right when I see them I have a disconnect of like I can't I would never ate I just they just look you say that now but if it gets to like ex machina Style
► 01:18:49what is his name for pedophiles what it says girl mannequin with realistic features what is Christ and that is creepy on the left what's the one that's not a sexual but I don't know why it's popping up there right on the property sex robot in the first thing is shot girl on girl mannequin with realistic features gross
► 01:19:42meet Harmony the sex robot
► 01:19:54this is one I've seen it's always some oh my God that's what she looks like that's how they wanted to let the head cover just asked if so weird that is unbelievably life like that that's crazy and seductively look at it because she's blinking I don't know if this was a science fiction movie from the 1960s and they have this we be like wow this is crazy because it would be so far removed from but this is not far-fetched
► 01:20:54we bypassed by is virtual reality brain Links of some sort of stimuli that you think things are happening all of this technology I think it's going to be both but I think I think you're right that that's coming to I think but I think this is coming too I think this this the ability to have like a real realistic robot battle fuck you that's not hard cuz you just think about all the moves that it has to do and it's a lot of moves I think you know also you'll be quiet I think also a good thing if it's possible to have a move have a robot like that to practice martial arts on improving so yeah but you got to do like like like Kik
► 01:21:54Pioneer cooking quickly but for something stupid I think this is like but this is good for is hyperextending your fucking elbows if you're going to miss this thing and hurt yourself I don't think that's a good idea honestly what do you think about having sex robot that same technology used for his I have a dummy that I practice Jiu-Jitsu on but it's still it's like this call the Bubba dummy it just lays there like this and but I can practice armbars and trying as I can but it's not as good as doing with the person but Target a person just stand there and let you do fucking choke them over and over and over again but a robot a robot could you can get a male sex doll you get an order at specific
► 01:22:53I want a butthole sealed I want the dick removed the mouth closed why does the butthole no one can accuse me about ocean and still work
► 01:23:18I specifically called and said no but why is this cock so large are you listening yeah yeah why is there a couple of specks of blood on it
► 01:23:39you keep the plastic on it like a phone you know when you get your phone bills real dolls they move like a real person like you if you didn't mind practicing on the girl real doc or the girl real dog with like small breasts and I also like the breast don't get in the way and then you could work your mouth get your arm bars in two triangles and then when you're done you fuck her I was there you go this is probably like dating you know know it's very different than they to go do they have like the excited like that when they're like I doubt it or they just stay away from that completely I bet they don't even train together she's done fighting now she just does WWE she's a piece of that supposed to give you something fun to watch for sale
► 01:24:39close to Roman times were like you know we want someone I mean like that I have a problem with it you know what to do because you know why it's like Muhammad Ali why would anyone do this you have a professional athletes like wow in Wyoming legalize bare-knuckle boxing that just looks horrible well that's the idea is you can't hit people is hard with bare knuckle so you going to get cut up a little bit but you're not you're not going to true no man what about what's-his-name to hit Rudy tomjanovich
► 01:25:39in the NBA in the 70s space to fist fight that used to have real fights and somebody got shot in the head and he broke his orbital bone so thanks man it would just fight oh you know what I'm talking about you found it see ya
► 01:26:01you know so what's what's happening here it's hard to see what's going on Rudy comes in the sky clocks him in the head looking the wrong dudes coming in till I like stop the fight and this guy thought he was coming that he's running right towards and then that will that ruin his career yes well that's an orbital fracture and it's real, in MMA it happens all the time but I can imagine with Knuckles know I do too bad I'm telling you these pants does the gloves not protecting the opponent the gloves are protecting your hand while I get that from doing this boxing gloves gloves and go over my head is stiff
► 01:27:01would 14 ounces I feel like Otis is yellow more speed
► 01:27:11it has moved very far at all I can't even listen that look terrible but you guys faces that can't be you can break someone's nose dude everybody's nose gets broken in the UFC everybody everybody's face gets broken orbital bronzes your world I hear your voice on FX and you just go in and you sound like a totally different person it's crazy like you're like that you're it you're in a whole different like in that mode to you know you just sound like if it was like Rocky a Rocky movie you know what you and then you hear the announcers that's you right there you got a damn man
► 01:27:55well but doing it a long time you seen with that punch that was 1977 and they probably didn't know how to fix those things back then but now they know how to fix orbital fractures and things along those lines that make it okay but I'm telling you it's not that guy punch that guy with gloves out of the just as bad though unless it was boxing gloves boxing gloves he probably wouldn't got hurt as much cuz you're dealing with a big thick heavy pad in a box goes 810 oz to Penny on the fight you know I just seems like it's worse you get mostly is Cuts Like You see those guys were all cut up because the knuckles the bare Knuckles are hitting skin what should I do this for knocking on I just feel now I just feel that would be like you shouldn't have even wraps
► 01:28:55Advance Auto cuz it gets people unrealistic idea of what you could do with your hands and why are there pads on your knuckles when there's not pads on your shins or pads on your knees or pads on your Gmail cuz you're smashing people with elbows is there is way more power that you can generate hitting someone with an elbow with a bear elbow than you can with a bare fist cuz a bare fist if you hit someone in the forehead or even in the cheek sometimes you'll break your head elbow Jamie I'm going to have you pull something up because I sent this to shabb
► 01:29:36is something that give me one second and I'll find this because Josh Emmett see if you can find just Google this Josh Emmett details hellish road back to health following Jeremy Stephens Koma cognitive ko'd by Jeremy Stephens who's like one of the most ruthless knockout artist in UFC and he's got major facial fractures major hit his like orbital was fractured his cheek bones fractured nasal cavity was fractured like fucking everything is fractured and he just had emergency surgery
► 01:30:33like the second surgery he went to Orlando where the fight was and they either misdiagnosed him or they missed some of the injuries but you still fucked up didn't catch a lot of things he says and then he went to another doctor and got an MRI in the immediately took him into surgery like to get out fucking whole head is broken so I don't get it this is legal this stuff not if there's no MMA wellspine I kickbox and I fought in a lot of Taekwondo tournament so you never did know there's nothing you do right now I'm 50 years old they don't but there are some guys that are in their forties and still fight but it's just as easy on me what time you're 40 you got to thank you been doing it for a long time which means you've been absorbing a lot of punishment for a long time yeah which means you're probably you should probably done you like if you want to live in
► 01:31:33you know seventies and eighties and be able to hold your bowels in and know where your keys are you know there's a certain point in time we can't get hit anymore other sports resort basketball players how they can't walk. Just a really tall guy and that down alone all those leverage points all the impact the concert and especially I mean a lot of guys who didn't understand overtraining the overtraining that injuries they just talked about work through them and I'm back injuries weird spinal issues that's why I think they should let every professional athlete for like there's a week. Where they get to take some steroids and recover a week because it was not enough be on a cycle for 6 to 8 weeks or every two weeks
► 01:32:33steroid creams in cryotherapy in the one paying these people do to entertain us take a moment. I'm going to get my steroids and get myself back to normal. The problem is when you go on a cyclic say if you want a steroid cycle your endocrine system shuts down and so then when you go off the steroids your body has a normalization. And a lot of time I don't know that the hard numbers but I think what they try to say is it's 50% of the time that you were on the steroids they say if your on steroids for 3 months you would need a one and a half month recovery period before your hormones normalized and sometimes you need help
► 01:33:24getting your hormones to normalize who's a bunch of things called clomiphene there's a bunch of dishes is that also illegal stuff yes all those are illegal you know what the regulations are what what sport you're in bed and all that shit I'm not I just don't have any room I look at Watch professional pool knockout I'll pay you one of those right now. You just did the darling we would never show this bullshit
► 01:34:05the next man I like what Cheese's in the sheets are you doing it on Mike
► 01:34:29you go a deep son you just made people throw up
► 01:34:33Google listening to the little funny of the fluid coming out of people's nose is so vile a sound you know I went somewhat you on a basketball court at some like that and some of those not stopping anything like this from the guy that wants to watch blood on people's face I don't want to watch blood on people's face I just think that it would be a more for a lot of mastic turn around and they're just like they're just like you know I don't get it knock outs for sure and then worse guys hitting people with big shots but it's like not specifically about blood in fact I think I don't like blood because it gets in the way and stops fights off the fight that's the argument against elbows actually it's the cut stop good fight but the only one that people aren't you throw that out like a big boy.
► 01:35:33that's not trying to get out I don't know how we got from sex robots to stop a circuitous path
► 01:35:52what happens on this podcast watch it a lot you don't need go from like I might have to get there no we don't even know we don't know what we did I don't know how it got there well I guess I should probably also plug my Nano my new specials coming out is that why you're here when is it coming out and check in the box and get it June 8th on Showtime American warrior I sent you a quick but I don't even watch American warrior the American to Eric is in the name American fry and so I have I just spelled with a K that America on Showtime was great and this on my first batch of the ugly truth that I was talking about Kevin Christie do that for me
► 01:36:52I wanted to be on the road and then like have a chicken next to me with my grenades on it
► 01:36:59why did chicken cross the road
► 01:37:04yes that's a great picture though man that he did a great job protesting I'm talking about kneeling for the national anthem me to Tiger Woods I'm going in on this phone it's weird about specials now that you understand me and you could tell that a year ago or two years ago and it's like we're not allowed to like you know topical shit right now it's like getting out there I want to know like for me like I want to know what Joe Rogan thinks about you know the stuff that's going on I want to see you talk about it for 30 minutes on a national scale I think we should be doing that because they're putting out stuff so fast anyway then it's like it's not like it's not special anymore did you need to stop calling and specials
► 01:38:04you should be like our conversations more year and you have to be a giant to get one it was like a celebration of your career in your fans it was not fans come watch this this guy's really funny and you never answer maybe
► 01:38:36my second one
► 01:38:40I'm dying up here Sundays on Showtime they wanted to come out with the show I said the same thing happened this year but I'm down if he's out you know if someone doesn't have Showtime can they watch it on Amazon and Showtime Anytime and then going on with Trump in the Trump era imagine like to see what he said today
► 01:39:26SeaWorld parking in all caps pardon himself. Pardon in all caps in all caps hero pardon like this is like it like we did this on Sundays on my podcast I voted for him is the Electoral College by the way if they took what they got rid of the Republicans would come to California to Northern California votes for them anyway so northern northern California anything between San Francisco and you know all the way down the five to come in here to not just Northern California in Northern California is being like in San Francisco but no driving above San Francisco
► 01:40:26all the way up to Oregon it's a day
► 01:40:33go to four states and they have three California city or state it wouldn't be good cuz La would have all the fucking bugging me it would be La San Francisco and then Farmers it would be another due to the electoral votes like we have 55 now so then it would be like what like the Domaine epicenter wherever there's Urban that thing people though they cannot they going to draw those California is the fifth largest economy in the world world Jesus Christ why would you not the United Kingdom United Kingdom in Scotland to write that's not just England Scotland who else is it Ireland
► 01:41:32set the rent a big fucking place isn't it like 20% of the entire population of the United States live in California I thought it was way more than that it was more before they think there's 20 million people here I don't think they were they doing the county special on the people that are here illegally how many people do you know that legally around people that are called
► 01:42:13actually though the lady that cleans my house she might be leaving
► 01:42:19do you want this job now is the last job I'll ever have and I'm going to need my money but let me stop you right there you're a funny dude and you're always going to do well. I'm going to pass out I'm working on it, supposedly competing but I want him to do well at it I think there's enough out there for everybody I really do I think that this stand up own personal time anyway it's not like it's like it's not live anymore nothing's live anymore that's true that's good, I just put them in the
► 01:43:19that's how I look at it cuz that's when I watch TV most of the shit I watch these days is on Netflix so it's all streaming yeah but you sustain if I drop 60 million dollars on Netflix I dropped 60 million to make a project and you watch it in 10 hours later then you're like what's next I bet you guarantee you in a couple years Netflix is not stop this the whole show comes out in one sitting ducks anticipate this person have any idea what he's talking about anticipation psychological anticipation waiting to see what happens
► 01:44:19you're on a Showtime show I see what's going on this motherfucker right now to see what's going on you're trying to like justify being on the Showtime show that's a good thing that they come out on Sunday is a good thing is a good thing for orange obviously is Uber successful like one of the most widely talk about the losing money all the time what are you talking about I don't know how much money Netflix made millions of dollars a month they make more money than anybody but it also putting out money if they're given stand-up comics 20 million dollars to makes battle specials a hundred thousand
► 01:45:19Edwin simple math in my head it's a lot buddy damn it I'm a stranger things stranger things expensive show millions of poor watch it next week in dollars a month that's when they have their contact I'm coming in to keep going to Disney's valuation do you know crazy that is Netflix doing well I'm happy the butt. That's showing you that you're incorrect Network Netflix is making ship tons of money. Just because they're
► 01:46:19it's business so how much do they make in Georgia to let me know when they do that but is it based on their earnings like cuz they want they making billions of dollars a year and they're making a profit Navy for 2017 they're looking more into like 20-25 that's what I'm talking about you did you not to give a fuck but obviously a Dusty so invested in Showtime on this model of Showtime do to use the time I saw you show time since I got the rights to it then I went back to Netflix kid
► 01:47:19which was now owned by Amazon so I think you can run get the audio you get the audio on Showtime has done for fucking Sebastian I mean a bad place today near Griffin business I'm all about yeah but only 10 minutes at a time so the next week
► 01:47:48to be in the middle of a bit
► 01:47:57episode 2
► 01:48:01dude you got to come up with some kind of specials out there that's what I'm doing I didn't reduction last time I like you know that's a waste of time for comedy yeah that's a long-ass time I did twice twice take the 2 second shows me the one you know well I did for last time in San Francisco my last one and then just want to Boston I did for two
► 01:49:00for money near me to pay more but you know what for me it was like I know you want to be loose because of that I was losing the first show I didn't just think I had two barrels my I was tired that's for Sho you and everything you know white people talking about it what's man Unapologetic I think I captured something here at Portland's and interesting place cuz it's it's to the point where they go so far left there like militant in a way I had a great time there man I was I had a great time there last time I was there I was like 6 months ago I fucking loved it do you find it like out there it's Sarah I find a comedy has been
► 01:50:00challenging it's differently it's not as the Trump era it's the era of outrage people are angry winners you know the angry when you want you guys in office you say anything like what's the king of the assholes today
► 01:50:34Shopko I don't know I think there's no for real I do not like a politician who is overly a swoosh I'm a very stable Genius of a stable genius is dark where he says I have every right to Pardon in all letters in all capital letters myself I will I look at that this morning and I got sick to my stomach a little just know how to do the job and it's not his fault that he was given the job like in the Republican party was watching the Trevor Noah show at least it was showing this clip of trump at a rally this is not he's already won and he's up there saying you know why they told me to say drain the swamp
► 01:51:34I don't like it he saying this I don't like it when you have contempt for the people that believed you know I said these things just to get elected and it worked and like there's other people they just were horrible candidate well Chris and Chris that was on my mind so why wouldn't you be an asshole why wouldn't you be like a sore winner you know what I mean music loader I get it but it's the age of outrage in this is like what we're seeing from the Roseanne stuff like the racist more times over the last few days for defending Roseanne she's mentally ill and then she's all kinds of pills
► 01:52:34I understand I'm going to say this too I think that this is a just because you can doesn't mean you should situation tweet something inappropriate of course you can should you when you have all of this things that you're responsible for sure of a show you your you know it's a show a family show you're on a family Network you have a lot of people's jobs that are depending on you just ugly and talked about her the same thing but you had you know it's like somebody a bitch
► 01:53:22okay there's a problem you people to have a problem with that you call somebody a black bitch then all the sudden that changes it to call somebody a black monkey bitch then you're like okay where is this coming from well perfect example is Samantha Bee call and Ivanka Trump affectless cunt and she said it on TV she said that was prepared like someone wrote that out as a part of her monologue she said it on television and then they apologize
► 01:53:53but the advertisers not good they're pulling out left and right but here's the thing with Roseanne she's not well this is a fact like I know I've talked to her she's told me I'll talk to the people who know I talk to people worked with her she's mentally ill but she talks openly about it she said she's on Ambien she's drinking she's smoking pot she's 66 years old she's not she's not well she smoke cigarettes she's out of it like she's got real mental issues now here's the thing if she had problems with her lungs and she was smoking cigarettes and coughing up blood and doing stupid shit like trying to run marathons people go hey you know what the fuck is wrong with you if you think you could run a marathon will be fucking stupid now that they wouldn't because they're all she's got an illness this is why she can't run this why she's coughing up blood she's got them
► 01:54:53mental illness she's mentally ill this is a fact that's why she's on so many different medications such as mental illness
► 01:55:01what if you were starting to get mentally ill are you saying that like saying like sort of over the racist things as Jewish when she said Planet of the Apes she said it because of her haircut cuz she looks like that lady from the Planet of the Apes she swear she swears and she swear to me on the phone this exact words I would never fucking say that I think I'm so stupid I'll call black lady plan of the issues I thought you was Jewish she goes look at her she doesn't look black when I mix it up she doesn't but she's she's Jewish to Amanda's you think someone said she did this she dressed up like Hitler and hedges cookies and she was baking and back in the day because she's a shit stir by the way she's also Jewish you know I think she gets a free pass on doing that but I think that would make a mistake this is what's missing from our society now she made a mistake you should be allowed to apologize for that mistake live with the shame and then you move on but we're trying to do now is remove people
► 01:56:01from society all together like I don't want it likes it I'm not going to explain that you were not going to excuse her behavior no reason is all the mental illness and all this kind of stuff is still a mistake what happened she's well enough to work on the television show so I'm saying she made a mistake and I'm not with I'm not with saying that she's a racist either cuz when I even when I read that I thought I don't know I'm just saying as a comic we say things that the regular person is going to translate the math into this is because you don't like black people are women or you don't like Jews you don't like them that's not how we operate be funny and biting when she look back on it she went oh I didn't notice the people out there listening but at the same time
► 01:57:01long time ago was way worse cuz she Susan Rice is clearly black and she did a common a long time ago I think it was like 2013 but she said Susan Rice is a man with giant swinging 8 Balls that's what she said now that is way worse that's way worse and that is a woman who's clearly black I mean you look at Susan Rice do it she's not racially ambiguous at all this other woman Valerie I don't know her name Jared she's she's got straight hair she's got light complexion she's at her intent was to be funny she is obviously not doing but first of all she was drunk and on Ambien and Ambien is a class Hamilton Morris sent me an email about this he's explaining it to me and then I talk to a sleep therapist about it there there's a type of drug that Ambien is that's called a hypnotic and this is one of the reasons why Ambien has so many
► 01:58:01weird side effects associated with it my friend Kevin James Kevin James got up in the middle of the night cooked a meal went to bed got up in the morning and he had his wife I confronted him like did you just do the design fucking do that and she's like no other Foods in the trash like you cooked it you hate days like I did not I did not eat that food it's in like he had to like come to grips with the fact that he was on Ambien he got up cooked a meal for himself had no recollection of it went back to sleep my mom was on Ambien she got up in the middle of the night and Drew on the shag carpet a white shag carpet in her bathroom with lipstick and with with the nail polish like a little kid she was I don't remember doing it at all to this it's scary shit I know a bunch of people that have had weird experiences on that stuff but you staying at somebody's house or on Ambien and messed up their shag carpet apologize to apologize for it
► 01:59:01what I'm saying with a baby she's also drunk on antidepressants you but you're not supposed to be and then she smoking pot which I'm sure you're probably not supposed to do either when you're on those things and she's an older lady who just got off of an exhausting schedule that almost in her words almost killed her she was at she had bronchitis when she was filming I'm saying she's not doing well she made a fucked-up mistake and she apologize but everybody wants a berry hermit I'm not and I'm not with it like you can't just decided that we live in right now that's just like jumped out but it's not just outrageous but we want to end your career like why do we want to end someone's career for fucking up like it's one thing like you said things like if she was not mentally ill there's nothing wrong with her they say if someone from let's just pick a sitcom
► 02:00:01different type of TV show that's on TV what's a new one like it is okay alright Big Bang Theory if that is a pretty blonde girl on The Big Bang Theory I don't know now what if that girl gets on TV and she's or she gets on Twitter and she says something totally racist throw some n-bombs you know like in there's nothing wrong with her she's like this is just how I feel and then they come after and they go fuck this bitch she shouldn't be on television she's racist she doesn't represent how America views people in 2018 she's archaic get her off the fucking are this is with this is what you can't get away with this anymore this in the 1920s this is 2018 that would be acceptable I understand that if you found a real hateful person she secretly has like a swastika tattoo somewhere and she's she's an evil person this is not the case with Roseanne does just not it's just not the case she's in
► 02:01:01older lady who's mentally Disturbed in on a fucking host of competing medications for her Consciousness that should be the reason why she needs help crazy things like she was America's sweetheart just a couple of weeks ago and now fucking unusual thing in our society very much reminds me of the Salem Witch Hunt you know this is the same kind of thing a little bit and we're still doing that now theism prone to it you think it's because people are scared that they're going to get called out on it themselves so when they see someone is doing something wrong to go out with everything they have Thomas to divert any sort of it because people are scared that people going to turn on them especially in this day in age with the people turn on people you know the Garrison Keillor story he's a saddest story
► 02:02:01business me to stuff because Garrison Keillor is a guy who had the Lake Wobegon Chronicles this PBS show radio shows on going for decades and he's a writer and he hugged woman shoes he was consoling already hugged her and apparently while he was hugging her his arm went down her back on her back and apologize she pulled away I apologize you sent her a letter e apologize you know what I'm sorry I didn't mean to do that she says don't want no worries don't worry about it years later when all this me to frenzy she brings us up he gets fired they pull his name off the shop for touching girls back it's crazy like the frenzy was so hot they didn't want to be accused of not doing anything so they pulled this guy right there is the Harvey Weinstein to the world is good there's people that are absolutely monsters right there's those people but then there's people that just got caught up in the wave of outrage and it should
► 02:03:01it's a strange strange time like that says there's no balance to another pendulum swing until you know our attitudes balance out I mean this site to meet the me-too movement is not a bad thing because it's bringing up some serious issues that we've had it since it's a great thing to happen so well in the meantime just going to be collateral damage until we get back to what time are we can like men who act like gentlemen and will be able to have interpersonal relationships with women at work in it in a setting and make it professional but at the same time sterile environment when you go to these like seminars cuz I can for our show now because of all this you have to have a show that I was on a 94 always say Define this you know it when you see it but that's what they used to say about pornography
► 02:04:01they got things that that applies to me that's not a good definition it's a problem but that is the definition for not recognizing that is how you know you're acting this is a bit much right now sometimes you hear about the two college kids that got drunk and had sex and the boy upon waking up and sobering-up decided to preemptively accuse the girl of sexual assault because he was intoxicated so he filed and went after her she got suspended from school they had to do it because the otherwise you know they would a sexist cuz they do it all the time if it's a boy and a girl it's always thought that if a boy like you know the Occidental College story so pretty famous story from a few years back with his two kids they were in college the other guy caught text the girl you know I'm coming over slick you have condoms he clearly has been established
► 02:05:01she was intoxicated that it was sex under the influence it was rape and so she goes to the University of fischels and they they suspend the boy he Sues and wins in the whole thing the whole thing's chaos because this kid gets kicked out of fucking school and actually did he win I need to know that if you want to start thinking it was fact-checked at Occidental when you have to have a notary so I can send to the other day that was saying is it physically possible for two people to simultaneously sexual assault each other and they're both drunk and like they get together and they're both sloppy and fucking hammered and they decide to have sex do they both sexually assaulted each other isn't this really about choices that we make what's also about taking responsibility for your actions if you're an adult if you just
► 02:06:01get in your car and you're drunk and he plowed into a bus and kill a bunch of people no one says oh Eric was just drunk he is not responsible for his actions you're responsible for your eyes if you're drunk if you drive your car to kill somebody but the idea is that if a girl comes over your house and you're drunk and you know you're not responsible for your actions and especially if you're a girl and you're drunk you're not responsible for your actions then if you're having sex with a guy but you're definitely responsible for your actions if you were a girl and you get in the car and drive and hit someone at the same time like a girl anyone should be allowed to be with her friends or with his friends and you get sloppy drunk you should you know the most egregious case is obviously cause because that was his think mean if he did do what everybody's accusing him of doing we have no reason to think you didn't
► 02:06:58he was taking people that we thought of him as a mentor and thought that he was going to help their career and that that was his hustle and he would just drugged them they wake up with their pussy sore and they're fucking pants off and not knowing what happened and be super confused it's horrible I mean that's that's the worst version or there's no like real definition you can't put it down in writing to say like this is what this is because then you got a situation where you're out on a date with someone things are going well you think it's going well you get in the bed and then that person in wood for whatever reason besides I think we should stop I don't want to do this anymore and that that that could be
► 02:07:44Zaxby's on the same level is drug and somebody Aziz Ansari case of 5000 word story about him not being a gentleman that's all that was not just died but she was just grossed out by it and decided to go after him
► 02:08:04state of being in a situation like like you know people got on the woman cuz they were like you know what he needs to Bloom three times right situation where you're like you're alright I was at a comedy club you know I told this girl this is years ago I told this guy said she was like I'm coming back to your hotel know if you are a girl that's that's where it gets really scared
► 02:08:33first of all everything she's saying to me this whole night up up to getting to my hotel if I would have done that to a woman abuse like that threatening what happened so I guess I was like I don't think it was really good at the time I wasn't I don't know if this is a good idea you should go home you know and then she's like no Hotel cuz we were hanging out at the hall this to everybody's hanging out this place after the Sunday night show me but I think you should
► 02:09:10it's like I'll give you massage it was all this kind of stuff
► 02:09:23I still am like maybe we time maybe we shouldn't do this you know and then she starts to like
► 02:09:32you're not into me it's because I'm I'm hideous so whatever it so now I felt like I don't want to be come across like I'm picking up what I'm saying about how I apply this to the fact I want to join speculating really we're speculating yeah I know I get it yeah that's definitely coming up to fly but I thought this if this was happening now this could be a situation could easily tell her story differently so we don't know
► 02:10:32she got it you know so that sometimes it's okay depending on the person that you're dealing with but that's the same situation with someone else this was horrible I die I felt I felt intimidated I felt you know it's all in how you interpreted yeah it's definitely depends on who's talking and not your tracks from example if you and your girlfriend decided to get drunk and your girlfriend was drunk and she called you up and said come on over you know I'm horny I want you to fuck me if you went over and get it you would in some people's eyes be guilty of sexual assault because she was drunk and she couldn't consent and this is why I never done that by the way my one of my ex-girlfriends was like that she wanted to get drunk really choose I just want to have sex when I'm drunk and I just couldn't do it I don't because you were nervous about it
► 02:11:27I always felt like if I'm not drinking it just feels she said she wants to do something we want to do I think she's going to get my butthole or whatever, okay I don't want to be the choice maker in that situation about not drinking right in that situation if you don't drink you never have to think like that person to hang out I thought sometimes I don't want to hang out with people that are like dumb drunk you out if you're so fucking gross gross you see your friends
► 02:12:27creepy guy you see the guy that you do what do I do right now but I love him and we are going to have an amazing time and you fucking hater this all the time it's set back like 20 years all my advances that I've made with hot chicks it's just been like I'm so glad it's about Harvey Weinstein being in control of a studio and scaring all those girls in the fucking I'm in allegedly raping some of them you know I mean I don't know what he did or didn't do but he definitely did a lot of shit I wish I just wish I wish it's too maybe now people will have the courage to like come out to the site certain kind of sucks to hear about like
► 02:13:27the most famous woman in Hollywood and she didn't say anything about getting caught in the crossfire so we can obliterate this sort of behavior and attitude from our culture but in the meantime while we're going through this is going to be some killers and it's going to be some people that get caught in the crossfire did you ever drink know when I was in high school and I have no friends would never had half a beer at a party one time and I was like what disgusting it was decided for me it was like 1999-2000 do you know my 2k going into that I was at a party that I was like I never want to be like this we were hammered chest that was a weird one was super drunk
► 02:14:27I need a minute he got drunk and left you with their baby I had to come on crazy party is over now confused as fuck was babysitting me back to Beethoven die vomit people that are like passed out like the whole party man and I invited some of my friend
► 02:15:23so if you're having a party and you think it's going to get crazy and I would have come a long vacation you know and when we went that deal was you that come on man you got to have some drinks so I had like a like a banana daiquiri on Autumn you know and I was like okay and then I had you know when you go to like you're going to resort vacation villas. Always be like a special at the bar you know that came out today is drink I said I had like 15% of that thing and I was yeah I was ready to get out to eat racist
► 02:16:03what about weed no weed eater weed so I tried one time we have, would you do how do you crazy person crazy person now you just call me it down with, that is your good crazy person you're very nice guy and legit need one of those type of things but I I rely on it you know I've just been great for me you know it's really been great love going to therapy I love cuz I feel like I can talk to somebody and then intellectualize things on a level that you can't answer to do with regular people and I'm not judge Human Nature
► 02:17:03things about myself and other things about like I was only child no single mom so there's all these things I've learned act with you know my girlfriend the way I do because of my mom and like you know my friendships and why I get angry about certain things and apply two things on stage in my life where people are like you know me D you know like I find myself being like someone is trying to hell I don't have a lot of equal relationship and when you see people you want to help them yes and my mom my mom went through a lot to get to the States you know she was from funeral believes you know in Central America and like just come here and here and her stories and like you know I haven't having to be somebody to take a Dallas 15 years old having to take care of my mom let you know you know her emotions were and so then that had an effect on me you know but I did learn this until I was able to go talk to a professional
► 02:18:03grocery dad I never met my dad single parent you never met my dad so thanks for bringing that up Joe Rogan places out there yeah I've never met my dad and then I thought people did you ever want to meet your dad did you ever see you know what's funny my mom so I think that's when you if you know my little bit and then they're gone that sucks realize you can't count on people but you can't has Trump become someone that people count on and count on people tight group of friends like me and my friends are very close like I would do anything for my friends and family to see I have a certain there's a certain level loyalty that I have because of that I understand it where someone who grows up in a big household filled with people in the family was always there never was there are you
► 02:19:03take people for granted a little bit you know where as for me, rotary and closeness and all that that's it means a lot to me it's very very important I remember asking my mom about my dad when I was like I don't know 1718 you know and she got really offended you know I don't want I don't want to find out the name and she was like if you want to do this on your own you're that kind of thing and I had the name for like a week and then I forgot it and that told me that it didn't matter so I ever since I never worried about it good for you when you have kids your bond with your kids it's like it's
► 02:20:03I mean I would assume that everyone spawn for children's very tight cuz it's an unbelievable love connection you have a children's conditional love is true unconditional like there a drug like they give you they give you love to the point where my daughter might my youngest was we're playing the other day in the pool and disappoint time we were just laughing about something together just laugh and I'm looking at her face she's laughing and I feel like I was on drugs I was like a love that I have for these people is so it's so intense it's just it's and it's also I didn't get that when I was a kid I didn't know you're saying Mana parents might know my mom work my step-dad was really good guy but no one was ever around you know that they just do is know in one they were done working everybody was tired you know I was a latchkey kid you know what did when I was like 7 years old I live in San Francisco I would go out and do a magic show on Fisherman's Wharf by myself just wander around the city disappeared open the door you just leave set
► 02:21:03asking imagine that I spend a lot of time by myself because my mom was working in my hunting by yourself young lady or another young lady you are connection with that kid will be it'll blow your fucking mind and I can change who you are I feel like that's what I've been lacking that's why I've been more open to you know thinking about these kinds of things you seem like a dad right now you know I've been drinking problem and I've been there the whole time
► 02:22:03very good friend of mine just my best friend who died of heroin
► 02:22:07and he was always fucked up it was always something it was always he had to crack problem for a while and then got on pills and it was his you to snort it or List it was like he already lying very much reminds me of this guy and Joey Diaz did a little bit too when I first met Joey it was like right after my friend Johnny Johnny still alive but I known people like Joey because of my friend Johnny but you know it's just I always was there for him I was always trying to take care of him I was only trying to help him but it just did he was always there was always something going wrong and it never did but it was his brief moments man where he be fine we would be laughing and we have the best time that's why you fight for it though cuz I was always I was always thinking that one day he was going to get it together by the same thing with my friend is like this still going on with me right now it's like
► 02:23:06piano lost his mother and you knowing that how that affected his whole life and it's like so I'm there and he's younger than me so I feel this mentorship and I just feel like a loyalty that I just can't shake so you know so that I know what I said when I go to therapy I want to ask why am I know and then I realized my own depressions are my own feelings cuz I feel like I'm dealing with it in some way so well sometimes I go and talk about things and I just no holds bar because I want to get this out I feel like this you know I don't like something and then combine that with we live in a society right now with people don't want to necessarily hear an opinion that is not theirs was definitely a little of that right and so then therefore we get this like it it becomes is tougher and tougher to do what we do but it's not going to stop me from doing it but it's it's sweeter and sweeter when you pull it off you know especially as man
► 02:24:06virtual shit yeah it's going to navigate the waters a little bit still but you don't have to vilify me you know you don't have to like you know it all goes back to like you know who we are as people because of like our our parents you know you know when it's like I ate my I love my mom and stepdad stepdad a great guy I'm glad he's in my mom's life you know they're off in Spain right now they move to Spain like a like I said like a year-and-a-half ago and so they are you know and I'm happy that she's happy in the later part of her life that's awesome you know yeah I mean look man at the end of the day it should be just about enjoying this experience just having time with people you care about the joint it's hard to figure out what it mean were very very fortunate in a lot of ways but one of the big ones is that you and I found comedy and sometimes
► 02:25:06Holly live without killing
► 02:25:09what I see some bullshit have it on TV Friday night and then you get off stage like it would tell me there's a better feeling to go away but we found another Outlet to work out you just got a little happy pill doing I got found out that I try to fill my life up with activities I enjoy doing but family is a big one to man family is
► 02:25:55it's a it's a different thing that changes you either I'm all I have all daughters it's all my house is off it's so feminine everything is females so it's not me not to talk about on my special about the Bruce Jenner thing about you don't like that my last special one before this one that it's just that if you live with crazy bitches long enough eventually become one you like more me or touch the more feminine version of yourself my God I'm so much more feminine than I've ever been ever so much more in tune with how girls think so much more tolerant of like nonsense talk is like a different but it's just like you realize like if I'm around like women when they're talking together and I'm going to observe and I wash them they just talked about different shit man me there at the end and then when you
► 02:26:55bare knuckle boxing fight you're interested in is stupid and for them to talk about what about the weather in shoes of the royal wedding a rid of all the patients that things aren't supposed to necessarily be equal that they're supposed to be like I always think that it's like a one of those scales you know and you put stuff in the scale on this side and she puts different things but that's how you balance out but they don't have to be the same thing you know people don't give love in the same way you shouldn't accept you shouldn't expect it to be you know if that becomes a problem I had a girlfriend what does she she didn't express love in a way that was like hugging and she don't want to do it that way she wasn't affectionate she wasn't affectionate she like that you buy me a TV or something you know
► 02:27:56and I understood it was because her family wasn't my internet connection we need people the most beautiful when you're just like happy and smiling because the moment she is in his like when I do
► 02:28:25she does have a relationship and wondering if she's mad and she what did she think I did pre-emptive if I do that will she get mad how do I know man I remember I was I was with a girl that I was dating at the time I was in my twenties I was very young at the time and I was with a couple of my buddies and we were talking and this guy was he was bringing up that this guy was having some crazy problem his girlfriend and I said oh yeah I go she's like oh she's crazy and here's a problem he don't want to get rid of her cuz she's fucking hot so she's like a girl from Real Housewives not real housewives Desperate Housewives Teri Teri Hatcher this was back
► 02:29:25she was in one of those fucking movies one of those summer movies way back in the day in the 90s so I think the way I described it then I said like a young Teri Hatcher and this girl got so mad at me she got so mad at me that I use Teri Hatcher a young Teri Hatcher to describe you being and I remember sitting there going what you're such an asshole what did I do I was talking about this guy's girlfriend is hot she's hot like a young Teri Hatcher that she is confused but she was in like some movie where I forget
► 02:30:18what the fuck the premise of the movie was but there was a guy in the movie that couldn't you couldn't deal with the fact that she was turned on at confused my point is this I didn't get it I was like what did I do wrong she was mad that I didn't use her as an example of someone really hot know how God Hears A Promise Comics like we are like you know we like to thinking logical ways but we also like to analyze things so like you know so like she asks like how if I feel ugly year you have to be like get to know what that moment oh is she fishing for me to say like or like she just woke up and you have to just be like how you look so great today I think you got to preemptively just throw those in there just just fucking decorate the plate with
► 02:31:19she knows he'll believe it talk about fucking bullshit me they just need it and they know you know they want you to know that they just need this right now whether you want to or not they just know they know that and then that's what they're really connected to know he's doing what he's doing that thing for me and for me that's all it is cuz I need that shit at all
► 02:31:56some girls just don't need it
► 02:32:03does God like you say that and save that and get that dick ready yes thank you mean that's the thing is like there's a definite deterioration of your physical being as you get into your 40s if you don't keep up it's in my power I put I put on weights I walk by a donut shop and I'll gain lie to Camp horrible I don't mind if it's all my plate out eat it so I have to
► 02:32:59cut down on what's on my plate when I met you you were thinner but I was always fluctuate remember this year I'm in the hallway at The Comedy Store I just got back from the Middle East so I was eating like a fucking Arab Prince over there just a fat fuck when I came back I'm in mid-conversation with Ari and in the conversation he leans over and grab my cheek what's going on
► 02:33:37I went to the gym the next day and I signed up with that what I would have personal trainer like that next day because the way he did it I was like oh shit it was I forgot so I had to just get back to it I just been comfortable but he's a comic
► 02:34:01yeah just holler tramp but the thing is man just working you can get someone to do like meal plans for a bunch of those companies that will make you healthy yeah you keep them in the fridge I want to just do it I know I can cuz I've done it be up if I did at the end of the year I did that Master Cleanse what's a master cleanse with cayenne pepper and maple syrup for a week okay that shit
► 02:34:39I did it for you should do for 10 days I got today 5 then the two days of the year that your body get used to like having salad and soup and then I had a Fatburger like I was bad I went from not eating meat from a year but you know what I learned from being vegan for a year is that the meat is not necessary the main course it's just a side dish with everything else so if you have a good thing of broccoli a good thing corn a good thing of mushrooms and then you have a good thing a steak then you don't have to have the steak and then had you can have some great side dishes okay well there's a lot of people that eat carnivore diet now so I don't people that are eating just meat very interesting I think I don't know
► 02:35:25you got monkey bars out there I've been working out twice a day my main thing is one hard workout a day and one less less hard workout today. If you think if you didn't do that that your physical your physical for sure I take time off proper average health or even above average health is here maybe what you're doing brings you up here so that diminishing you're talking about it just going to bring you some more average normal level but still in great shape or maybe you're overdoing it I'm just wondering because everything I'm making sure your health is good and my body is in good shape but I just know that if you don't use it you lose it there just a fact that and when I say workout twice a day what it means is usually I'll do yoga during the day or
► 02:36:25pills and then at night all this way to do a Navy SEAL workout unless I'm doing like a cardio Kettlebell workout or something intense at this gym they have you could do the boxing and then another day you can come if you could do like weight training better big thing with you is just what you're eating the animal cookies this the circus animal cookies I have in my kitchen right now it's not good to PacSun I get it but I have a pack of 52 my gut area especially as you get older
► 02:37:18going to me it's harder and harder as you get older why you got to keep up that's the whole thing to work on my physical at the same time you feel better I want to feel that way more energy cut out the sugar and everything that is delicious salads and fish eat healthy have some red meat but in moderation you have any crazy to Mulan that rise a lot of shared a lot of water I drink a lot of water honey price of bullshit potatoes and oil you know what are you getting out of that really we we we have some fries yeah but you just can't can't can't have it all the time
► 02:38:18vodka marinara sauce and some shrimp it was delicious we just had the same meal I did last night the devil is in the details I like it taste good but I just don't allow myself to do it very often the most of the time I ate real clean I'm when I'm trying to get defensive because I went over there plenty of equipment we could work out side by side till I got my shoes
► 02:39:10I think the comics it's like it's it's it's important to alleviate a certain amount of angst upset and yet you know you like pissed off at shit but you don't want to upset on stage hating yourself right you know this is alcohol or you know what am I saying makes you lazy butt lazy people shouldn't smoke weed Ryan I know what you're saying well as a person who smokes weed it really bothers me because I'm not lazy at all and I just I hate that connection between lazy people and we cuz I don't think that's I don't think that's what makes you lazy this winning combinations
► 02:40:10Cleveland Cavaliers tie ball game the other guy he dribbles out cuz he thought that they were up
► 02:40:35and the look on his face was like that kind of like I've seen this highland I'm not saying that smokes a lot of love it there a brilliant people that smoke weed successful those fucking shoulder 6-9 250 probably 6% body fat the shoulders on that 33 years old can epic comment but there's another picture of him like straight on what you think he literally looks like an Avenger like he could be like some sort of like keep him the fuck away from Jeff novitzky for The Smiling hundred percent that's a high guy
► 02:41:35brain slip yeah but there's plenty of pictures of me that look like that too when I'm sober they did catch you catch you you can just look up the website has it in their contract they don't test for weed but these guys are all getting high I told you I play pool pool marijuana as a performance-enhancing drug hundred percent it makes you don't have to I'm telling you I'm just
► 02:42:35now do you say to LeBron James needs weed no like there's a lot of pro pool players who are top of the food chain and don't do anything but a lot of guys who like it say that we did bumps our game up quite a bit and I'm one of them it makes me play better I'm telling you you don't know because you don't smoke weed experiment sober okay and then you going to see results and then see the problem is if I put warmed up for the playing pool sober and I'll definitely play better High a separate separate days to wait which Fox up your pool game like nothing here we go tell me you use of marijuana Matt Barnes
► 02:43:35in the Hall of Fame no pussy you saying this guy doesn't smoke pot lot of people get high and send them to you via too and they say it makes a game better what's the Practical use of Jiu Jitsu well if you and I were in a fight that would kill you if you had told me to go walking to your car late at night and then three guys came at you what's the perfect circumstance then headed your car I don't think you understand marijuana at all
► 02:44:35refer to be sober I am I need a one pic that I mean if I'm sober or high if you said what I want to be drunk or sober fuck yeah I want to be sober makes you a little bit paranoid to put you on edge that makes you aware shit okay you like very cleanly on what you're doing but if you're drawing of music or something along those lines were you really trying to focus a lot of writing a lot of people really like it for those things because it makes you really focus on what you're doing but then I think what happens then is that that's whatever they were doing on that they don't apply it to cuz I have a lot of friends
► 02:45:35when I started with them I know that they're not doing what they're doing now and that there that they didn't keep going exceed their expectations but I don't think it is I think the pot is just common denominators is the common denominator is no work ethic agreement on this means the study would be skewed because a lot of failures that get high all the time would be in the study right but a lot of winners I get high all the time don't want to talk about it by the way I'm with you 100% on this I what I hate is that the people that don't have any work ethic they look at somebody with a work ethic that smokes weed and then say will look without the CD
► 02:46:35as I didn't start smoking weed until like 2000. I'm not listen to my anti weed but I just did that with anything there should be moderation year was Ari and Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer and I we did this sober October thing to wear for a Sade song it's a no pot and we had to do 15 hot yoga classes in the month and I learned a lot in that month I really did are you different person because another one I'm going to see Barry Katz just about to pot
► 02:47:27Stoner thought no it's not it's not whether or not you smoke pot it's whether or not you get things done and whether or not you write out what you're supposed to do whether or not you you have to try to achieve goals whether or not you're you're actively trying to improve whatever you doing what do you build cars or make carpet Cabinetry it's just about whether or not you're working towards succeeding and improving and listen I agreed I'm not anti-pot I'm Rob not I shoot love the people that are around a lot of us we should be anti-pot I should be anti-pot do I know a lot of people that were made me sad like I'd run into him at the comedy store and then like job those are all the time I've ever met in my life
► 02:48:27Snoop Dogg the exception not the rule I wonder there's a lot of people involved in like the tech world to get a lot and what people think about it is that it looks like everything else man it can be good for you or I could fuc U world at you know I mean moderation I think there's some benefit to it in with the benefit is vulnerability creativity and makes you read your your awareness if you already have a level of vulnerability just going on stage and talking about things for sure I mean it's in your life hopefully yeah unless you tell about Planet of the Apes joke on Twitter
► 02:49:21when I marry an Indian
► 02:49:27she got that old-school had to get it back but I don't know if she will bounce back from this new era of the fucking hate and anger no one is bounce back why don't think it wasn't taken out well because show was cancelled or anything like that accept the Netflix show and he didn't do anything to the point where it was like a crime but a lot of people in after my cat Sam Samantha Bee lady went after him and he was a stick at a certain point you would loses credibility sort of what happened you know like you do not talk about going hard on a person committed a crime you going hard in the person that's involved in an interaction with two people I would like to see those like someone likes a man to be to like
► 02:50:27cuz he used to come on her show me hurts for him well unless he can handle himself in that form I would like to see that it's I see the even that I think those forms are hard to do you know I did Ben Shapiro's podcast that just aired yesterday and he is a Sunday special things he does and is an hour long and every 15 minutes he stops a conversation does a commercial and why I was sitting there doing I was like I really like this guy I really like talking to him brilliant guy but this is not the best way to stay loose and have a conversation I got you this is the best kind of conversations that we've had over the past 3 hours this is the best format just talk nothing nothing to Rob's you there's no sensors if there's nothing you have it at
► 02:51:27and also like it's best with friends like you know I care about you know and everything and you know we're going to have fun there's no I'm not looking to get you trying to have fun with you and we had fun you know when this this is like the best format to get to understand people I think what we're missing today in this world in this is this is just
► 02:51:53an open thought people need more opportunities to be cool with each other and less it take advantage of less opportunities to attack each other I see a lot of talking lately and I don't know if they'll be attacking is because there have been so many egregious crimes that need to be corrected like Harvey Weinstein or like in a fill in the blank with all the other monsters that have been out there it's like I'm not going to keep texting you just go to whatever else I think somebody's listening to our pocket right now and somebody texted my girlfriend and she's like ask you to send me a text message be married
► 02:52:40I know what that means but I'm hoping that it all balances out I hope it comes back around people just I think that it would just be nice to each other while me an example it's a hard thing with the issues we forgot how to be gentlemen we've been in this situation if he just been a gentleman I don't know I don't know if you don't want to come over texting back and forth and it was like you barely know to your place now you don't talk about
► 02:53:34act like a gentleman that's what I'm saying I know these hot chicks yeah maybe you should I should have I should have like stopping but I let my own ego get in the way of that my own my own insecurity of being like this to me so let me know what time to what time I think we should and when is your special what is a shih tzu days Showtime Chesapeake Friday June 8th Friday night but I shout out your weekend I'll be in Irvine if you want to come see me there and then Showtime I'm dying up here is Aaron right now on Showtime episode 6 will be next Sunday in the fall you know so I check me out there at Eric Griffin I love you
► 02:54:35beautiful but thanks brother appreciate being hung all right yeah we did it thank you to our sponsors thanks to the people at Omaha Steaks give you all that yummy me for Father's Day go to Omaha steaks.com type Rogan in the search bar and you can get this Omaha Steaks Father's Day package at 78% off again just filet mignon top sirloin chicken fried steaks gourmet hot dogs meatballs and more so don't wait this offer ends soon go to Omaha steaks.com Rogan in the search bar grab your dad and fire up the grill again it's a limited-time package for only 49 99 when you go to Omaha steaks.com type Road in the search bar and add the Father's Day
► 02:55:35package to your cart and thank you also once again to the cash app if you go to the Google Play or the App Store download the cash app enter the reward code Joe Rogan one word and you will receive $5 in the cash app will send $5 to Justin wrens fight for the Forgotten charity to build Wells for the pygmies in the Congo all right that is it for today my funky friends we will be back tomorrow and I will see you then at 5